When you’re feeling down, it’s natural to want to pull yourself out of the slump—but let’s be honest, not all of us actually do that.
Source: Unsplash In fact, most of us are world-class experts at wallowing. We’ve all had those days when, instead of doing something that might actually help, we lean into the misery and do things that make us feel ten times worse.
It’s a strange sort of self-sabotage, isn’t it? We know we’re making things harder on ourselves, yet we keep at it. Whether it’s scrolling through social media until our brains turn to mush or choosing a bag of crisps over a proper meal, these habits end up piling more stress onto an already bad day. If you’ve ever wondered why you can’t seem to shake a low mood, it might be because you’re accidentally feeding it with these common behaviours.
1. We compare ourselves to influencers, celebrities, and even peers on social media.
Source: Unsplash There’s nothing like scrolling through a perfectly curated Instagram feed to make you feel like your own life is a bit of a shambles. We’re sitting there in our pyjamas, fuming over a pile of laundry, while looking at someone’s filtered highlight reel from a beach in Bali.
We forget that it’s all a performance—nobody posts photos of their bank balance on a Tuesday or their messy kitchen. Taking a break from the apps isn’t just about digital detoxing; it’s about stopping that constant, unfair comparison that leaves us feeling like we’re failing at life.
2. We don’t get enough sleep.
Staying up late to finish just one more episode of whatever we’re bingeing feels like a treat at 11 p.m., but it’s a total disaster by 7 p.m. When we’re tired, everything feels heavier, and our patience for the world disappears. It’s a recipe for being irritable and groggy, which only feeds into a bad mood.
Sticking to a decent sleep schedule, even when you’d rather stay up, is one of the best things you can do for your head. It’s hard to feel positive when your brain is running on four hours of sleep and three cups of coffee.
3. We live on junk food and caffeine.
When we’re stressed, the last thing we want to do is spend 40 minutes chopping veg. It’s much easier to grab a takeaway or skip lunch altogether, but that leads to massive blood sugar crashes that make us feel like rubbish. You end up on a rollercoaster of sugar highs and caffeine jitters, which makes it almost impossible to stay level-headed. Making time for a proper, balanced meal doesn’t make you a health nut; you’re just giving your brain the actual fuel it needs to function without crashing.
4. We procrastinate on stuff that’s important and wouldn’t take long to take care of.
Putting off that one big work project or the pile of life admin might feel like a relief in the short term, but it’s a false economy. That task just sits in the back of your mind, growing bigger and scarier the longer you ignore it. Eventually, you end up in a cycle of self-criticism because you haven’t done it yet. Breaking things down into tiny, manageable chunks makes them look a lot less daunting and stops that looming cloud of “I should be doing this” from ruining your evening.
5. We don’t do any exercise.
It’s easy to make excuses to skip the gym or a walk, especially when the weather is typical for the UK, but being stagnant is a fast track to feeling low. We aren’t built to sit in a chair for 12 hours a day. Even a quick 10-minute walk around the block can clear the cobwebs and give you a bit of a mood boost. It’s not about training for a marathon; it’s just about moving your body enough to remind your brain that you aren’t actually part of the furniture.
6. We dwell on past mistakes.
We’ve all been there: it’s 2 a.m. and you’re suddenly cringing over something stupid you said in 2014. Replaying your embarrassing moments or “what if” scenarios doesn’t change a single thing about the past, but it definitely ruins your present. Learning to forgive yourself for being human and focusing on what’s happening right now is the only way to break that negative cycle. You can’t move forward if you’re constantly looking in the rearview mirror at everything you think you did wrong.
7. We isolate ourselves when we’re feeling down.
When we’re feeling low, the instinct is often to shut the curtains, turn off the phone, and disappear. While a bit of peace is fine, total isolation usually makes things feel a lot darker. We end up stuck inside our own heads with nobody to tell us our thoughts are getting a bit irrational. Reaching out to a mate for a quick chat or even just being in the same room as someone else can give you the perspective you need to stop spiralling.
8. We set unrealistic expectations for ourselves.
Having goals is great, but setting impossible standards for yourself is just a way of guaranteeing you’ll feel like a failure. If you tell yourself you’re going to overhaul your entire life in a weekend, you’re going to be disappointed by Sunday night. Learning to set achievable goals and actually celebrating the small wins—like finally clearing that inbox or making the bed—builds up the confidence you need to tackle the bigger stuff later on.
9. We let self-care slide.
In the middle of a busy week, things like a proper shave, a decent shower, or even just sitting down with a book for 10 minutes are usually the first things to go. We tell ourselves we haven’t got the time, but neglecting the basics just makes us feel haggard and unvalued by the person who matters most—ourselves. Making time for the things that recharge you isn’t a luxury; it’s essential maintenance. If you don’t look after the engine, the car is eventually going to stop running.
10. We’re our own worst, relentless critics.
The way we talk to ourselves in our own heads is often far harsher than anything we’d ever say to a mate. We’re constantly pointing out our own flaws, over-analysing our mistakes, and running a non-stop commentary of “not good enough.” This kind of negative inner dialogue can absolutely wreck your self-esteem. It takes effort, but challenging those nasty thoughts and being a bit kinder to yourself can change your entire outlook on the day.
11. We avoid tough or awkward conversations.
Sweeping a problem under the rug might seem like a great way to keep the peace, but those unresolved issues don’t just go away—they sit there and ferment. Whether it’s a row with a partner or a concern at work, avoiding the chat just leads to a massive pile-up of anxiety. Learning to speak up and be honest, even when it’s awkward or uncomfortable, is the only way to get that weight off your chest and actually find some peace of mind.
12. We take on more than we can handle.
Being helpful is one thing, but overcommitting yourself is a fast track to burnout. If you’re constantly saying yes to every invitation, every extra shift, or every favour, you’ll end up with zero time for yourself. You’re trying to please everyone else while you’re falling apart in the background. Learning to set some boundaries and prioritising your own energy isn’t selfish; it’s the only way to stay sane and actually be useful to the people who really matter.
13. We ignore our physical health.
Most of us are guilty of ignoring a nagging pain or a constant feeling of being run down until it becomes a massive problem. We skip the dentist, push back the doctor’s appointment, and hope it’ll just fix itself. However, your physical health and your mental health are totally linked. If you’re ignoring your body, your mind is going to suffer too. Taking care of the “vessel,” even the boring bits like regular check-ups, is a huge part of feeling like a functional human being.
14. We spend too much time indoors.
Between working from home and having everything delivered to the front door, it’s incredibly easy to spend three days without ever breathing fresh air. But being stuck indoors under artificial lights is a massive mood killer. It’s amazing what a 20-minute walk or just sitting in the park for a bit can do for your perspective. Getting some actual daylight into your eyes helps reset your internal clock and gives you a much-needed break from the four walls you’ve been staring at all day.
15. We forget to appreciate the good stuff.
When life is a bit of a slog, it’s easy to get tunnel vision and only see the things that are going wrong. We focus on the rain, the traffic, and the bills, and completely overlook the small wins. It sounds a bit “self-help,” but actually taking a second to appreciate the good bits, even if it’s just a decent cup of tea or a laugh with a colleague, rejigs your focus. It doesn’t make the problems disappear, but it reminds you that life isn’t 100% rubbish, which is a pretty good starting point for turning things around.
