Romance fraud is one of the most devastating scams out there, not just because it costs people money, but because it plays on their emotions.
Basically, scammers pose as love interests, building trust before tricking victims into handing over cash, personal details, or both. It can happen to anyone, regardless of age or experience, and the effects go beyond financial loss — many people are left heartbroken and ashamed. Here’s what you need to know about romance fraud and how to protect yourself. You might think you’re too clever, and it could never happen to you, but you might be surprised at just how convincing these criminals can be.
1. Scammers create fake identities to seem perfect.
Romance scammers don’t just randomly message people; they carefully build convincing identities. They often use stolen photos, fake names, and detailed backstories to make themselves seem like the ideal partner. Everything about them is designed to be appealing. They might claim to be successful professionals, military personnel, or business owners living abroad. Their story always includes a reason why they can’t meet in person, which is key to keeping the scam going without suspicion.
2. They move the relationship forward very quickly.
One major red flag is how fast scammers try to escalate things. They shower their targets with compliments, affection, and grand declarations of love in a very short time. The goal is to create emotional dependency before the scam even starts. They’ll often say things like, “I’ve never felt this way before” or, “I know we haven’t met, but I feel like I’ve known you forever.” Their dramatic intensity is meant to make the victim emotionally invested before any requests for money come up.
3. They avoid video calls and in-person meetings.
Since scammers use stolen photos and fake identities, they can’t risk a real-life meeting or even a proper video call. They’ll always have an excuse — bad internet, work commitments, or even security reasons if they claim to be in the military. If someone refuses to meet in person or make a live video call after weeks of chatting, that’s a serious warning sign. A genuine romantic interest will want to connect face-to-face in some way, even if it’s just over video.
4. They come up with urgent financial problems.
At some point, the scammer will introduce a problem that requires money. It might be a medical emergency, a business setback, a family crisis, or even an issue that prevents them from meeting in person. The requests often start small before escalating. They rely on emotions to pressure their target into sending money quickly, making it seem like a life-or-death situation. Victims often feel guilty saying no, especially if they’ve been emotionally manipulated into believing they’re in love.
5. They ask for money through untraceable methods.
Scammers don’t want money sent in ways that can be reversed or traced back to them. Instead, they ask for bank transfers, gift cards, cryptocurrency, or wire services like Western Union. Once the money is sent, it’s almost impossible to get back. Any request for money, especially from someone you haven’t met in real life, should be treated with extreme suspicion. Legitimate romantic partners don’t ask for financial help from people they barely know.
6. They pressure you into keeping it a secret.
Scammers know that friends and family might notice the red flags, so they’ll try to isolate their victims. They might say things like, “People won’t understand our love” or “Please don’t tell anyone — I don’t want them to judge me.” By keeping the relationship a secret, victims are less likely to get advice from loved ones who could point out the warning signs. If a new romantic interest is asking you to hide your relationship from other people, that’s a huge red flag.
7. They often target people who are vulnerable.
Romance scammers don’t just pick random people — they often target those who are widowed, divorced, or feeling lonely. They know that people looking for companionship are more likely to trust someone who offers kindness and attention. But even confident, tech-savvy people can fall for these scams. The emotional manipulation is so strong that even those who would normally be cautious can get drawn in. That’s why awareness is key — anyone can be a target.
8. They use stolen photos and fake profiles.
Source: Unsplash Scammers steal pictures from real people—often models, military officers, or professionals — to make their fake profiles look legitimate. They might even use different photos across different platforms to appear more authentic. You can check if an image is stolen by doing a reverse image search on Google or TinEye. If the same photo appears under multiple names or on scam warning websites, that’s a clear sign something isn’t right.
9. They disappear if you refuse to send money.
Source: Unsplash Once a scammer realises they won’t get any money, they often vanish completely. They might block their target, delete their profile, or suddenly claim they have to go overseas and won’t have internet access. If someone who claimed to be deeply in love with you disappears the moment you set a boundary, they were never genuine to begin with. A real partner wouldn’t abandon the relationship over money.
10. They might try to scam you again later.
Source: Unsplash Some scammers keep a list of past targets and try again months or years later with a new identity. They assume that enough time has passed for the victim to let their guard down. They may also sell victims’ details to other scammers. If you’ve been targeted once, be extra cautious of anyone new who comes on too strong or asks for money.
11. They don’t just scam for money — sometimes it’s personal details.
Source: Unsplash Not all romance fraud is about getting cash. Some scammers are after personal information that can be used for identity theft, such as your address, passport details, or banking info. They might say they need your details to send a gift, book a flight, or even list you as a beneficiary. No matter how convincing they seem, never share sensitive personal information with someone you haven’t met in person.
12. They use emotional blackmail to get what they want.
Source: Unsplash Romance scammers don’t just ask for money—they make their targets feel guilty for hesitating. They usually say things like, “I thought you loved me” or “If you really cared, you’d help me.” That kind of manipulation is designed to make victims feel like they’re the bad guy for questioning things, but real love doesn’t involve guilt-tripping someone into financial or personal risk.
13. The best way to prevent romance fraud is to be sceptical and stay informed.
Source: Unsplash The most effective way to avoid romance scams is to be cautious, no matter how convincing someone seems. Never send money or personal information to someone you haven’t met in person, and always question sudden financial requests. If you suspect a scam, stop communication immediately and report the profile to the platform. If you’ve already sent money, contact your bank as soon as possible. Romance fraud can happen to anyone, but awareness is the best defence against it.
