Most people aren’t villains scheming in the shadows, but sometimes you do get that uneasy feeling that someone’s working against you.
They’re probably not doing it openly (that would be pretty diabolical), but they’re definitely scheming in little ways that start to add up. Sometimes it’s hard to know whether you’re being a bit paranoid or if your gut is right about them being up to no good. Luckily, if you know what to look for, the patterns speak for themselves. Here’s how you spot when someone might be plotting against you before it explodes in your face.
1. They act overly nice, but only when people are watching.
When someone flips on the charm in front of other people, but treats you cold or passive-aggressively when you’re alone, it’s not kindness, it’s cover. They want everyone to see them as the good guy while quietly undermining you behind the scenes.
That performative kindness can be a distraction from their real motives. Pay attention to the energy when it’s just you and them. If the vibe changes drastically, trust that more than the smiles they show the crowd.
2. They ask a lot of questions, but offer very little back.
It’s one thing to be curious. It’s another to gather information like they’re building a case. If someone’s always fishing for your thoughts, plans, or opinions but stays vague about their own, that’s not small talk. In fact, it could be strategic. People who are scheming often play the long game. They want to know what you’re up to so they can either twist it, use it, or beat you to it. If it feels like they’re collecting data, they probably are.
3. They “accidentally” let things slip.
Watch out for people who constantly reveal things you told them in confidence, but try to play it off as a slip-up. These “accidents” always seem to benefit them, not you. That’s pretty calculated “forgetfulness.” Whether it’s gossip, private plans, or stuff you’d never want repeated, if they keep leaking info that puts you in a bad spot, they’re not clumsy. They’re setting you up.
4. You keep hearing things you supposedly said, but definitely didn’t.
People who are plotting often plant seeds. If friends or coworkers start coming to you confused about something you apparently said (but you definitely didn’t), someone’s been twisting your words behind your back. That sort of manipulation is annoying, especially because it’s intentional. It’s designed to isolate you, damage your credibility, or stir the pot while keeping their own hands clean.
5. They’re overly interested in your failures.
Some people act extra helpful or supportive when things go wrong, but there’s a smirk underneath it all. If they’re always around when you mess up, quick to ask for the details, or even seem a little too pleased, that’s not support. That’s satisfaction. They may not be openly sabotaging you, but they’re rooting for you to lose. And if they’re in a position to subtly nudge things in that direction, don’t assume they wouldn’t.
6. You get left out of things you should be part of.
When people start “forgetting” to include you in meetings, group messages, or conversations you’re clearly meant to be part of, that’s not just poor memory. It’s often a calculated way to exclude your voice and make sure you stay in the dark. Being left out repeatedly, especially when there’s something at stake, isn’t a coincidence. It’s often a sign that someone doesn’t want you in the room while they’re shaping the narrative.
7. They flatter you, then undermine you in the same breath.
This one’s subtle but dangerous. Someone might compliment you in public, only to turn around and tell other people how “surprisingly capable” you are or how you “mean well, but…” That praise is bait, and the backhanded bit is the real opinion. When someone’s plotting, they’ll often disguise criticism as kindness. It lets them look like they’re rooting for you while quietly tearing you down.
8. They encourage your bad ideas, but never your good ones.
Ever notice someone clapping for your worst ideas while staying oddly silent when you’ve come up with something solid? That’s sabotage with a smile. If someone only validates you when you’re on the wrong track and goes cold when you’re onto something smart, they’re not trying to help. In reality, they’re making sure you stay a step behind.
9. You always feel like you have to defend yourself around them.
If you constantly leave interactions feeling like you said the wrong thing, didn’t explain yourself enough, or have to double-check your own intentions, that’s not your gut being insecure. Really, it’s reacting to something real. People who are plotting against you often create a vibe where you’re always second-guessing yourself. It keeps you off balance, which makes it easier for them to spin things how they want.
10. Other people seem nervous when your name comes up.
If people who normally like you suddenly seem awkward or avoid eye contact when your name’s mentioned, that’s a red flag. It usually means someone’s been talking, and not in a good way. People rarely get weird for no reason. If the vibe changes when you walk into the room, someone’s been planting ideas about you behind your back.
11. They act territorial over things that don’t belong to them.
Plotters don’t just want to win. What they want is to control. So if someone’s weirdly possessive over group work, common spaces, or shared credit, it’s because they’re trying to steer the ship without you noticing. When people go out of their way to edge you out of decision-making or keep you uninformed, that’s supposed to be a power move.
12. You catch them lying, and they don’t even flinch.
One of the biggest signs someone’s plotting is how smoothly they lie when caught. If they spin it effortlessly, gaslight you about what was said, or somehow turn it back on you, that’s not just manipulation, it’s practice. People with a plan often know exactly how to cover their tracks. The calm in their lies is what makes it dangerous. Trust actions over excuses.
13. Your gut just won’t settle around them.
Even if nothing dramatic has happened yet, sometimes your body knows before your brain catches up. If you feel drained, tense, or uneasy after every interaction with someone, don’t ignore it. That discomfort isn’t imaginary. When someone’s energy feels off consistently, it’s probably because something is off. You don’t need proof to pay attention. Your instincts are there for a reason, so make sure you listen to them.
