We’re often taught that forgiveness is a virtue—and, for the most part, it is.
Giving someone a second chance can lead to growth, healing, and stronger relationships. That being said, there are some people who genuinely don’t deserve another shot at your trust, heart, or friendship.
While you shouldn’t hold grudges forever, knowing when to close the door can save you from repeated disappointment and pain. Here’s a friendly reminder of the types of people who simply don’t deserve another chance—and why keeping them at a safe distance is sometimes the best thing you can do.
1. People who constantly lie to your face
We all tell little white lies sometimes, but habitual lying is another story. When someone consistently lies, even about small things, it makes trust impossible. You end up doubting everything they say, feeling confused, insecure, and endlessly frustrated. Offering another chance to chronic liars only gives them more opportunities to twist the truth. Healthy relationships rely on honesty, and constant deceit isn’t a mistake; it’s a conscious choice. You deserve better than that.
2. Manipulators who twist every situation
Manipulative people use guilt, charm, or emotional blackmail to control you. They’re great at making you doubt yourself and even question reality. After spending time with them, you often feel drained, confused, or guilty, even when you’ve done nothing wrong. Repeatedly giving manipulators second chances just invites them to keep playing their emotional games. Stepping away is often the only way to regain your emotional balance and peace.
3. Those who repeatedly break promises
Everyone slips up occasionally, but repeated broken promises reflect a deeper problem: disrespect or indifference. Constantly letting you down means they either don’t care about your feelings or they’re unwilling to put effort into the relationship. Second chances rarely lead to change here. Instead, they usually reinforce the idea that you’ll tolerate broken promises indefinitely. You deserve relationships where promises are respected and honoured.
4. Anyone who disrespects your boundaries
Your boundaries aren’t just suggestions—they’re important guidelines for your emotional health. When someone regularly ignores or deliberately pushes past your limits, they’re showing clear disrespect for your well-being. If you keep giving second chances, they’ll keep ignoring your boundaries. Healthy relationships respect your limits, and it’s crucial to stand firm to protect your own peace of mind.
5. People who repeatedly betray your trust
Trust is foundational to any healthy relationship. If someone repeatedly breaks your confidence, shares your secrets, or disregards your privacy, they’re choosing to hurt you. Trustworthy people don’t make a habit of betrayal. Offering them another chance usually ends in more betrayal. Protecting your trust and your emotional safety is far more important than giving someone another chance they don’t deserve.
6. People who refuse to acknowledge their mistakes
No one’s perfect, and mistakes happen. However, mature people acknowledge their errors, apologise genuinely, and learn from their experiences. If someone consistently denies wrongdoing or passes the blame onto you, they’re unlikely to grow or change. Giving them another chance won’t encourage self-awareness. Instead, it simply teaches them they can continue to evade responsibility without any consequences.
7. People who take advantage of your kindness
Your kindness isn’t a weakness, it’s a strength. However, some people see kindness as an open invitation to exploit you emotionally, financially, or otherwise. They rarely give anything in return, and you end up feeling used and exhausted. Second chances for such people usually lead to more exploitation. You deserve friends and relationships that value your generosity and reciprocate it rather than abuse it.
8. Those who repeatedly cheat or betray your loyalty
Cheating and betrayal aren’t mistakes—they’re deliberate choices. Someone who repeatedly betrays you is consciously deciding their desires matter more than your feelings, trust, and relationship. Offering repeated second chances to a cheater rarely results in meaningful change. Protecting your heart and well-being should always come first.
9. People who constantly put you down
If someone consistently insults, belittles, or criticises you under the guise of “jokes” or “constructive feedback,” they’re damaging your self-esteem. You end up feeling insecure, small, and unsure of yourself. Giving them more opportunities usually means more hurtful comments. Healthy relationships uplift and encourage—not tear you down repeatedly.
10. Those who gaslight you all the time
Gaslighting is a subtle yet powerful form of emotional manipulation. It causes you to doubt your perceptions, memories, and feelings, leaving you uncertain about what’s real or true. This isn’t accidental; it’s intentional emotional abuse. Second chances for gaslighters give them more control. True relationships rely on honesty and validation, not confusion and manipulation.
11. Anyone physically or emotionally abusive
Abuse, in any form, is never acceptable. Someone who intentionally harms you physically or emotionally doesn’t deserve another opportunity to repeat that harm. Abuse is a conscious decision, not a misunderstanding. Forgiving abuse doesn’t require giving another chance. Your safety, well-being, and dignity always matter most.
12. People who consistently put their needs above yours
Relationships require balance. If someone regularly expects you to prioritise their needs while completely ignoring yours, they’re not genuinely interested in a fair partnership. In the long run, this leaves you feeling exhausted and undervalued. Repeated second chances reinforce their selfish behaviour. You deserve a relationship where both people’s needs are equally considered and respected.
13. Those who invalidate your emotions repeatedly
Your feelings matter, and anyone who regularly dismisses, mocks, or minimises them doesn’t respect you. Emotional invalidation can damage your self-worth and emotional health after a while, and you deserve better than that. Offering endless second chances only allows them to continue disrespecting you. Healthy relationships value empathy and emotional support.
14. People who apologise only to avoid consequences
An apology without genuine remorse or changed behaviour means nothing. Some people apologise simply because they were caught or fear consequences, not because they genuinely regret their actions. Giving them second chances usually leads to more empty apologies. Real apologies involve accountability, sincerity, and genuine efforts to improve.
15. Those who repeatedly make you doubt yourself
Anyone who consistently makes you second-guess your worth, decisions, or intuition is toxic. Healthy relationships build your confidence and provide reassurance—not constant doubt or insecurity. Continuing to offer second chances to someone who undermines your self-belief isn’t kindness; it’s emotional self-harm. You deserve people who boost your confidence and validate your worth.
Ultimately, second chances should lead to growth, understanding, and improvement—not repetitive hurt. Recognising when someone isn’t worthy of your forgiveness has nothing to do with holding grudges; it’s about protecting your emotional health and choosing people who truly respect and care for you. Life’s too short to invest in relationships that only bring you down.
