Ever tried to call out a narcissist on their less-than-stellar behaviour?
If so, you’ve probably encountered a barrage of deflections, denials, and downright bizarre excuses. Narcissists are masters of twisting the narrative to maintain their inflated sense of self and avoid taking responsibility for their actions. That’s why they’ll often come out with these lies they spin when confronted with their BS.
1. “You’re just too sensitive.”
Source: Unsplash This is a classic narcissist tactic to deflect blame and make you question your own perceptions. They might try to convince you that you’re overreacting or misinterpreting their words and actions. But don’t be fooled; your feelings are valid, and their behaviour is not your fault.
2. “You’re imagining things.”
Source: Unsplash When confronted with evidence of their wrongdoing, a narcissist might resort to gaslighting. They might deny things that clearly happened or twist the truth to make you doubt your own memory. This can be incredibly confusing and frustrating, but remember, you’re not going crazy; they’re trying to manipulate you.
3. “I was just joking.”
Narcissists often use humour as a weapon to disguise their insults and put-downs. They might make hurtful comments under the guise of a joke, then claim you’re too sensitive when you call them out on it. This is a manipulative tactic to avoid accountability and maintain control.
4. “You’re the one with the problem.”
When you confront a narcissist about their behaviour, they might try to turn the tables and make you the villain. They might accuse you of being unreasonable, jealous, or even crazy. This is a deflection tactic to shift the focus away from their own flaws and insecurities.
5. “I’m the victim here.”
Narcissists often see themselves as the victim, even when they’re clearly in the wrong. They might exaggerate their own struggles and misfortunes to garner sympathy and attention. This allows them to avoid taking responsibility for their actions and maintain a sense of superiority.
6. “You’re making a big deal out of nothing.”
When you try to address a legitimate issue with a narcissist, they might try to minimise your concerns or dismiss them altogether. They might claim you’re being dramatic or making a mountain out of a molehill. This is a tactic to invalidate your feelings and avoid a meaningful conversation.
7. “Everyone else thinks I’m great.”
Narcissists often rely on external validation to bolster their fragile egos. They might boast about their popularity or accomplishments to deflect from criticism. But don’t be swayed by their attempts to impress; their self-worth is not dependent on your opinion.
8. “You’ll never find anyone better than me.”
Source: Unsplash This is a common manipulation tactic used by narcissists to maintain control in a relationship. They might try to instil fear and insecurity in you, making you believe that you’ll never be able to find someone who loves you as much as they do. This is a form of emotional blackmail, and you deserve better.
9. “You’re just jealous of me.”
Narcissists often accuse people of being jealous when their own flaws or insecurities are exposed. This is a way to deflect criticism and maintain their sense of superiority. They might claim that you’re envious of their success, looks, or popularity, even if there’s no evidence to support this claim.
10. “You’ll never understand me.”
Narcissists often create a mystique around themselves, portraying themselves as complex and misunderstood. They might use this tactic to avoid taking responsibility for their actions or to manipulate you into feeling sorry for them. But remember, everyone is capable of being understood, and their unwillingness to communicate openly is not your fault.
11. “I’m only doing this for your own good.”
Narcissists might justify their controlling or manipulative behaviour by claiming they’re acting in your best interests. They might try to convince you that they know what’s best for you, even if their actions are clearly harmful or self-serving. This is a form of gaslighting, and it’s important to trust your own judgment.
12. “I’m not perfect, but I’m trying my best.”
While everyone makes mistakes, narcissists rarely take genuine responsibility for their actions. They might offer a half-hearted apology or claim they’re trying their best, but their behaviour rarely changes. This is a tactic to avoid accountability and maintain control.
13. “You’re overthinking this.”
When you try to address a legitimate concern with a narcissist, they might accuse you of overthinking or reading too much into the situation. This is a way to invalidate your feelings and avoid having a meaningful conversation about their behaviour.
14. “I’m the only one who truly loves you.”
Narcissists might try to isolate you from your friends and family by claiming they’re the only ones who truly care about you. They might criticize your loved ones or try to convince you that they’re holding you back. This is a manipulative tactic to maintain control and dependency.
15. “You’re lucky to have me.”
Narcissists often believe they’re better than everyone and that you should be grateful for their presence in your life. They might remind you of all the things they do for you, or how much better you are with them than without them. This is a form of emotional manipulation to make you feel indebted to them.
16. “I’ll change.”
Narcissists are often resistant to change and personal growth, so when they claim they’re going to become a whole new person, it’s usually nonsense. They might refuse to acknowledge their flaws or get help for their behaviour. This lack of self-awareness can be frustrating and hurtful for those around them.
17. “I didn’t mean it.”
Source: Unsplash Narcissists might apologise for their hurtful words or actions, but their apologies are rarely sincere. They might blame their behaviour on stress, exhaustion, or other external factors. This lack of genuine remorse makes it difficult to rebuild trust and repair damaged relationships.
