They say nothing worth having comes easily in life, and that might be true.
However, not everyone is prepared to put in the hard graft and keep going when things get tough, as is bound to happen at times. The minute they spot the first sign of trouble, they throw in the towel and give up, missing out on some pretty amazing opportunities and experiences. Weirdly enough, people without that deep-seated sense of resilience tend to have these other qualities in common, too.
1. They have a fear of failure.
The thought of messing up is just too much for them to handle, so they prefer to quit before they even try. It’s less about avoiding failure and more about not being able to cope with the thought of things not going perfectly. But here’s the thing—failure is part of the process, not the end of the road. Once they realise that, it might ease some of the fear and help them embrace mistakes as part of growing.
2. They struggle with perfectionism.
If it’s not going to be perfect, they often won’t even bother. The pressure to get everything spot on from the start holds them back, leaving them stuck in place. They need to focus on progress instead of perfection—after all, you can’t get it perfect until you start. Once they learn to take those first imperfect steps, they’ll likely feel more confident pushing through.
3. They have low frustration tolerance.
When things don’t go as planned, they lose their patience pretty quickly. Challenges become obstacles instead of opportunities to learn. Breaking tasks into smaller, easier-to-manage bits can make it feel less overwhelming. That way, they can build the mental strength to handle things without immediately feeling defeated.
4. They lack confidence in their abilities.
They often convince themselves they’re incapable of doing something before they’ve even given it a shot. This self-doubt can make quitting seem like the easier, safer option. A little boost in confidence can make a huge difference, though. Small successes can help remind them that they’re more than capable, and sometimes just taking that first step is all they need to feel empowered.
5. They’re overly focused on instant results.
If they don’t see quick progress, they assume it’s not worth the effort. But growth doesn’t happen overnight. Learning to appreciate the small wins and moments of progress along the way can help them stay motivated, even when the big result feels far off. Patience is key, and they need to understand that meaningful change takes time.
6. They’ve never learned to push through discomfort.
Hard work and persistence feel like foreign concepts because they’ve avoided difficult situations in the past. They might not know how to push through when things get tough. But teaching them that discomfort is temporary and often leads to growth could help them build the resilience they need. The more they practice sticking with it through the tough spots, the easier it gets.
7. They overthink everything.
Instead of taking action, they get caught up in endless scenarios of “what ifs” and worst-case outcomes. The result? They talk themselves out of even starting. Reminding them to focus on the next step rather than stressing about the entire process can calm the overthinking and help them just get on with it.
8. They compare themselves to other people constantly.
They look at how well other people are doing and start feeling like they’re falling behind. This constant comparison drains their motivation, leaving them ready to quit. The key here is to get them to focus on their own journey instead of constantly measuring themselves against someone else. When they see how much they’ve already achieved, it might give them the push they need to keep going.
9. They lack clear goals.
When they don’t have a clear direction or sense of purpose, it’s easy for them to lose interest when things get tough. Setting achievable goals that break down the bigger picture into manageable chunks can keep them on track. The more specific the goal, the easier it is to stay motivated and see their progress.
10. They avoid taking responsibility.
Blaming everything else for their struggles makes quitting seem easier. It’s simpler to say “this isn’t for me” than to take responsibility for their own challenges. Encouraging accountability, while offering support along the way, can help them push through and keep going even when the going gets tough.
11. They have a history of being overly sheltered.
If someone has always had people stepping in to sort things out for them, they might not know how to face difficulties alone. Giving them the space to learn how to handle challenges independently can help them build their confidence. Gradual independence is the key—it might take time, but eventually, they’ll feel more capable of pushing through tough spots.
12. They’re afraid of being judged.
The fear of looking bad or disappointing people can make them quit before anyone has the chance to criticise. It’s like they’d rather not try than face the possibility of judgement. A supportive, non-judgemental environment can help them take risks and face challenges head-on without fear of being put down.
13. They focus too much on past failures.
Every mistake from their past feels like a reminder that they’ll fail again. The constant focus on past failures keeps them stuck in a cycle of quitting to avoid disappointment. Helping them reframe these past setbacks as lessons instead of failures can be empowering, encouraging them to try again with a fresh perspective.
14. They lack a support system.
Without the encouragement of close friends or family, it’s easy for them to give up when things get tough. Having a solid support system can be the difference between quitting and pushing through. Sometimes, all they need is a nudge or a bit of reassurance from someone who believes in them.
