We all know that being upfront and honest is usually the best way to go, but that’s not always easy to implement.
Sometimes, you really can’t be bothered to get into it with someone, especially when you know drama and overblown conflict is pretty much guaranteed. Also, there are situations in which saying what you really think or mean isn’t appropriate or acceptable, like at work. Either way, chances are, these passive-aggressive phrases are a part of your lexicon. Don’t feel too bad — we’re all guilty of it!
1. “Per my last email…”
This business classic basically translates to “I’ve already told you this.” It tends to pop up in endless email threads where someone clearly missed a key detail. The longer the email chain, the sharper this phrase becomes—especially when followed by a few conveniently pasted lines from previous messages.
2. “Just wondering if you saw my message…”
This is the digital equivalent of waving frantically from across the room. Often sent after you’ve seen that they’re active online but somehow haven’t responded to you. And if there are dots at the end… well, you can feel the mounting frustration from here.
3. “Thanks in advance…”
This one’s the polite way of saying, “I’m assuming you’ll do this.” By thanking someone for something they haven’t agreed to do yet, you’re basically wrapping them in a guilt blanket. They’ll feel obligated to come through, or risk feeling like they let you down.
4. “No offence, but…”
This is always followed by something that will definitely offend. It’s a flimsy shield for dropping criticism and then retreating to safety. By starting with “no offence,” the speaker gets to sound considerate… while still landing a not-so-subtle jab.
5. “As previously discussed…”
The workplace version of “like I already told you.” This one usually shows up in emails when “you really should’ve been listening.” It’s a way to remind someone of their responsibilities without outright saying, “This was your job, remember?”
6. “I’m just saying…”
This is the verbal equivalent of throwing a thought grenade and casually walking away. It’s a phrase people use to “soften” blunt advice or criticism, even though it rarely works. It actually just highlights the comment more, and everyone knows it.
7. “Whatever works for you…”
Translation: “I’m pretending to be flexible, but I actually hate this idea.” Often delivered with a smile and a raised eyebrow, this reeks of forced patience. The longer the pause before it, the more you know they’re not thrilled.
8. “Good for you!”
This is the Swiss Army knife of backhanded compliments. It’s useful in all kinds of situations, from genuine congratulations to a bit of quiet judgment. The real meaning is in the tone—more enthusiasm usually means more disapproval hidden underneath.
9. “Don’t worry about it…”
Narrator: You should absolutely worry about it. This guarantees they’re going to remember this forever and might even bring it up in future discussions. A dismissive wave usually follows, just to drive the point home.
10. “I’ll just do it myself…”
This is the battle cry of the martyr, usually said while dramatically taking over a task you could handle perfectly well. The deep sigh that comes with this phrase conveys disappointment, frustration, and a sprinkle of moral superiority.
11. “Not to be rude, but…”
Spoiler alert: Rudeness is coming. This is a warning that something unnecessarily harsh is about to drop. The speaker acts like they’re softening the blow, but we all know what’s really coming.
12. “If that’s what you think is best…”
This is basically them washing their hands of the situation while still judging it. It’s a subtle way of saying, “I’ll let you do this, but I already know it’s a mistake.” Expect an “I told you so” down the line.
13. “Just trying to help…”
Usually said after some truly unwanted advice that wasn’t exactly helpful. This tries to make you feel guilty for not appreciating input you didn’t ask for. It’s the verbal equivalent of a shrug and a look that says, “Well, excuse me for caring.”
14. “Fine, great, perfect…”
None of these things are actually fine, great, or perfect. This rapid-fire string of positives signals maximum displeasure. Each word gets a little more forced as they try to hide just how much they really, really disagree.
15. “Noted.”
Source: Unsplash One word, yet somehow packed with so much shade. “Noted” manages to acknowledge what you said while subtly hinting that they’re going to ignore it. The period at the end adds an extra layer of dismissal.
16. “As per our conversation…”
This is definitely the phrase of choice for creating a paper trail, and it usually appears when someone wants to remind you of a verbal agreement that’s suddenly being forgotten. The more formal this sounds, the more they’re gearing up to cover their tracks.
17. “Up to you!”
Source: Unsplash Don’t be fooled by how cheerful this sounds—it’s really saying, “Go ahead, make the wrong choice.” Often delivered with an innocent smile, this is used when someone has a strong opinion but wants to dodge responsibility for the decision.
