“Respect your elders” is pretty common advice, but advanced ages doesn’t automatically make you worthy of being held in high regard.
You can’t get away with rude, inconsiderate, and careless behaviour just because you’re getting up there in years, that’s for sure. The truth is that if you want people to respect you into your senior years, you need to get rid of some of the bad habits you picked up along the way.
1. Stop complaining about everything that bothers you.
Constant complaining can make you seem negative and unpleasant to be around. While it’s okay to voice concerns, try to focus more on solutions or positive aspects of situations. People respect those who can maintain a balanced perspective and don’t sweat the small stuff. Instead of complaining, try to go into challenges with a problem-solving mindset.
2. Stop gossiping about other people behind their backs.
Gossiping might seem harmless, but it can damage your reputation and relationships. As you get older, people expect more maturity and discretion. Try to steer conversations away from idle gossip and focus on more constructive topics. If you have concerns about someone, address them directly or keep them to yourself. Respectable people are known for their integrity, not their ability to spread rumours.
3. Stop trying to always be right in every conversation.
The need to always be right can make you appear stubborn and close-minded. As you age, it’s important to show that you’re open to learning and considering different viewpoints. Listen more, and acknowledge when other people make good points. People respect those who can admit when they’re wrong or don’t know something, rather than those who argue just for the sake of being right.
4. Don’t ignore new technology and cultural changes.
While it’s not necessary to be on top of every trend, completely ignoring technological advancements and cultural shifts can make you seem out of touch. Make an effort to stay reasonably up-to-date with major changes in technology and society. This doesn’t mean you need to adopt every new gadget or trend, but showing a willingness to learn and adapt can earn you respect from younger generations.
5. Don’t make ageist comments about yourself or other people.
Self-deprecating jokes about your age might seem harmless, but they can reinforce negative stereotypes about ageing. Similarly, making ageist comments about younger people can come across as bitter or out of touch. Instead, embrace your age and the wisdom it brings. Treat people of all ages with respect and focus on common ground rather than generational differences.
6. Stop interrupting people when they’re talking.
Interrupting is often seen as rude and disrespectful, regardless of age. As you get older, it’s important to demonstrate good listening skills. Let people finish their thoughts before responding. This shows that you value their opinions and are confident enough in your own thoughts to let other people have their say. People respect those who can engage in thoughtful, balanced conversations.
7. Don’t dismiss new ideas just because they’re unfamiliar.
It’s easy to fall into the trap of rejecting new ideas simply because they’re different from what you’re used to. However, this can make you appear stubborn and set in your ways. Try to approach new concepts with curiosity rather than scepticism. Ask questions to understand better instead of immediately dismissing ideas. Being open to innovation and change can help you stay relevant and respected as you age.
8. Don’t use outdated or offensive language.
Language evolves, and terms that were once commonplace may now be considered offensive or inappropriate. Make an effort to update your vocabulary and be mindful of potentially hurtful language. If you’re unsure about a term, ask or look it up. People respect those who make an effort to be considerate in their speech, regardless of their age.
9. Stop trying to force your opinions on everyone.
As we gain life experience, it’s tempting to think we know best and try to impose our views on other people. However, this can come across as preachy or overbearing. Instead, share your perspective when asked and respect everyone’s right to their own opinions. People appreciate those who can offer wisdom without being pushy or judgmental.
10. Don’t neglect your personal grooming and appearance.
While it’s true that looks aren’t everything, neglecting your appearance can give the impression that you’ve “given up”. Maintain basic grooming habits and dress appropriately for various situations. This doesn’t mean trying to look younger, but rather taking care of yourself and presenting a neat, put-together image. People respect those who take pride in their appearance, regardless of age.
11. Stop constantly reminiscing about “the good old days”.
Source: Unsplash While it’s natural to look back fondly on past experiences, constantly talking about how things were better in your day can make you seem stuck in the past. Try to balance reflections on the past with engagement in the present and optimism for the future. People respect those who can appreciate history while still embracing the present and looking forward to what’s to come.
12. Stop making excuses for your behaviour.
As we age, it can be tempting to use our age as an excuse for poor behaviour or mistakes. However, this can undermine respect. Take responsibility for your actions and words, regardless of your age. If you make a mistake, own up to it and apologise if necessary. People respect those who show accountability and maturity, rather than those who try to deflect blame.
13. Don’t ignore your health or refuse to see a doctor.
Neglecting your health or stubbornly refusing to see a doctor when needed can be seen as irresponsible. Take care of your physical and mental health, and be proactive about medical check-ups and treatments. People respect those who take responsibility for their health and don’t burden people unnecessarily due to preventable health issues.
14. Don’t be overly rigid in your routines and habits.
While routines can be comforting, being inflexible about them can make you difficult to be around. Try to be more adaptable and open to changes in plans or routines. This flexibility shows that you’re easy-going and can roll with the punches. People respect those who can maintain a balance between structure and spontaneity in their lives.
15. Stop trying to control everything and everyone around you.
Source: Unsplash As we age, we might feel the need to exert more control over our environment and the people in our lives. However, this can come across as overbearing or manipulative. Learn to let go and allow everyone to make their own decisions. Respect people’s autonomy, even if you disagree with their choices. People appreciate those who can offer guidance without trying to dictate every aspect of a situation.
16. Don’t become overly dependent on other people for things you can do yourself.
While it’s okay to accept help when needed, becoming overly reliant on other people for tasks you’re capable of doing can destroy respect. Strive to maintain your independence as much as possible. Learn new skills if necessary to adapt to changing circumstances. People respect those who show resilience and a willingness to tackle challenges, rather than those who expect everyone to cater to their every need.
17. Don’t belittle people’s feelings or tell them to “get over it”.
Source: Unsplash With age comes perspective, but that doesn’t mean other people’s feelings are invalid. Avoid dismissing people’s emotions or experiences, especially those of younger generations. Instead, try to empathise and offer support if needed. People respect those who can acknowledge and validate people’s feelings, even if they don’t fully understand or agree with them.
