Everyone likes to think they’re a good person, and for the most part, they probably are.
However, that doesn’t mean there’s no room for improvement. There are certain things we believe and ways we behave that can dull our shine and keep us from being the kind of people the world needs more of. If you’re really dedicated to leaving this big ball of dust better than you entered it one day, here are some important truths you need to accept. (I’m still working on them myself!)
1. You’re not the hero in everyone’s story.
Tough pill to swallow, but you’re probably the villain in someone’s tale. We all make mistakes, and sometimes our actions hurt people unintentionally. Accepting this doesn’t make you a bad person — it makes you human. The key is to learn from these moments and strive to be better, not perfect.
2. Your intentions don’t always matter.
Sure, you meant well, but impact trumps intent every time. If you’ve hurt someone, focusing on your good intentions won’t heal their pain. Instead of getting defensive, listen to how your actions affected other people. Take responsibility, apologise (and mean it), and work on doing better next time.
3. Being kind isn’t always easy.
Kindness isn’t just about being nice when it’s convenient. Sometimes it means having difficult conversations, setting boundaries, or standing up for what’s right even when it’s uncomfortable. Real kindness takes courage and isn’t always met with gratitude. Do it anyway.
4. You can’t please everyone.
Trying to make everyone happy is a one-way ticket to burnout and inauthenticity. Good people have strong values and stick to them, even if it means disappointing some folks. Focus on being true to yourself and your principles rather than trying to be all things to all people.
5. Your world-view is limited.
No matter how well-travelled or educated you are, the way you see the world is shaped by your experiences. Recognising the limitations of your perspective is a must. Stay open to learning from people, especially those with vastly different backgrounds. True wisdom comes from acknowledging how much you don’t know.
6. Forgiveness is for you, not them.
Holding grudges hurts you more than the person who wronged you. Forgiveness doesn’t mean condoning bad behaviour or keeping toxic people in your life. It means letting go of the anger and resentment for your own peace of mind. It’s a gift you give yourself, not a favour to other people.
7. You’re not entitled to anything.
The world doesn’t owe you success, happiness, or even basic kindness. Believing you’re entitled to these things leads to bitterness and disappointment. Instead, approach life with gratitude for what you have and determination to work for what you want. Your attitude can make or break your happiness.
8. Your comfort zone is a trap.
Growth happens outside your comfort zone. If you’re always playing it safe, you’re missing out on opportunities to become a better version of yourself. Challenge yourself regularly. Take risks. Make mistakes. That’s how you learn, grow, and ultimately become a more well-rounded, empathetic person.
9. Being right isn’t always important.
Sometimes, preserving a relationship or someone’s dignity is more important than proving you’re right. Pick your battles wisely. Ask yourself if winning the argument is worth the potential damage to your relationship or the other person’s feelings. Often, it’s not.
10. You can’t control other people’s actions, only your reactions.
Trying to control how people behave is a pointless exercise that’ll only leave you frustrated. Focus on the one thing you can control: your own reactions. Work on your emotional intelligence and learn to respond to situations thoughtfully rather than reacting impulsively.
11. Your past doesn’t define you, but it does shape you.
Your history isn’t an excuse for bad behaviour, but it does influence who you are. Acknowledge how your past experiences have shaped your beliefs and actions. Work on healing old wounds and breaking negative patterns. You have the power to write your future, regardless of your past.
12. Happiness is a choice, not a destination.
Waiting to be happy until you achieve certain goals is a recipe for perpetual dissatisfaction. Happiness is a state of mind you can cultivate daily through gratitude, mindfulness, and positive actions. Choose to find joy in the journey, not just the destination.
13. Everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about.
That person who was rude to you? They might be going through hell. Practice compassion and give people the benefit of the doubt when you can. This doesn’t mean tolerating abuse, but it does mean approaching people with empathy and understanding.
14. Your words have power.
What you say matters more than you might think. Your words can uplift or destroy, heal or hurt. Be mindful of how you speak to other people and yourself. Strive to use your words to encourage, support, and spread positivity. Remember, once said, words can’t be unsaid.
15. Self-care isn’t selfish.
You can’t pour from an empty cup. Taking care of yourself isn’t selfish — it’s necessary. Prioritise your physical and mental health. Set boundaries. Take breaks when you need them. By taking care of yourself, you’ll be in a better position to help people.
16. Change is the only constant.
Resisting change will only bring you suffering. Learn to adapt and embrace new situations. See change as an opportunity for growth rather than a threat. Flexibility and resilience are key traits of good people who can weather life’s storms.
17. Your actions speak louder than your words.
It’s easy to talk about being a good person, but your actions are what really count. Do your behaviours align with your values? Are you walking the talk? Focus on doing good, not just talking about it. Consistency between your words and actions builds trust and integrity.
18. Vulnerability is strength, not weakness.
Opening up and showing your true self takes courage. Don’t confuse vulnerability with weakness. Being honest about your feelings, admitting mistakes, and asking for help when you need it are signs of emotional strength. Vulnerability encourages genuine connections and personal growth.
19. You’re responsible for your own happiness.
Relying on other people to make you happy will only ever lead to disappointment. Take charge of your own joy. Pursue your passions, cultivate meaningful relationships, and create a life that fulfils you. Remember, you’re the author of your own happiness story.
20. Life isn’t fair, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be.
The world can be a cruel place, but that’s no excuse to add to the negativity. Choose to be fair and kind, even when life isn’t fair to you. Your integrity in the face of adversity speaks volumes about your character. Be the change you wish to see in the world.
