Sometimes, we believe things in life without questioning where they came from or if they actually make sense.
Maybe we even change our lives according to those beliefs, whether out of habit because we’ve been raised with them, or because we adopted them out of the desire to make sense of a chaotic and inexplicable world. However, you don’t want to spend the rest of your days living by beliefs that, deep down, you know don’t really align with who you are at your core. Here are a few ways to figure out whether your beliefs are genuinely yours, or simply inherited from other people.
1. Think back to where you first picked it up.
Have you ever thought about when you first started believing something? Was it something your parents always said, or did it come from a teacher, or someone you admired at one point? Often, the beliefs we carry with us are the ones that were drilled into us when we were younger. The problem is, we tend to hold on to them even when we grow up, simply because they’ve become second nature. It’s really worth thinking about where they came from and whether they’re even your own thoughts anymore. By reflecting on how it all started, you can see if this belief was passed on to you, or if it’s something you genuinely believe now.
2. Ask whether it really lines up with what you’ve experienced.
Sometimes, we hold onto beliefs even though they don’t match our own experiences. For example, you might have a belief about a certain kind of person or situation, but when you’ve actually interacted with them or been in those situations, things turn out differently than you expected. Our personal experiences are often the best indicators of truth. If a belief doesn’t reflect what’s actually happening in your life, that’s a sign it might need a second look. Try to be real with yourself about whether it matches the reality you’ve experienced.
3. Check if it’s based on fear or fact.
A lot of the beliefs we hang on to are tied to fear. Maybe you’ve been told things like “Don’t try that, or something bad will happen,” or “Be careful, you might get hurt.” While some of these warnings may come from a good place, many are fear-based, which isn’t always helpful or healthy. Ask yourself whether your belief is based on actual facts or just an emotional reaction. When we hold onto something because of fear, it often limits us more than it protects us. It might be time to challenge those fears, look for evidence, and see if they’re as rational as we think.
4. Look for confirmation bias.
Have you ever noticed how easy it is to find information that supports what you already believe, but the stuff that contradicts it gets ignored? That’s confirmation bias at work. It makes our beliefs feel so much more solid than they might actually be. It can be really uncomfortable to challenge what we believe, but actively looking for information that goes against it is one way to get a clearer picture. If your belief holds up after looking at all sides, then it’s probably more solid than you thought. But if it falls apart, maybe it’s time to reconsider.
5. Ask if it stands up to scrutiny.
Source: Unsplash Sometimes we hold onto beliefs without really thinking about them because they’ve been repeated so often. But when we start asking why we believe them, sometimes they don’t stand up to scrutiny. If you find yourself stumbling when you ask “Why do I believe this?” or “Does this make sense?” then that’s a red flag. A solid belief should be able to withstand a few tough questions without falling apart. If it crumbles under scrutiny, maybe it’s a sign that it’s more of a habit than something you really believe.
6. Consider if it’s tied to a specific culture or era.
Beliefs often come from the time and place we’re in. What was once considered the norm in a certain culture or time period can feel totally irrelevant today. Think about whether the belief you’re holding onto comes from a specific culture or era. What might have made sense back then might not apply now. The more you can recognise the cultural or historical context behind it, the easier it is to decide whether it’s still relevant to your life today. Sometimes, it’s about realising that the world has changed, and so should some of the things we hold onto.
7. See if it aligns with your values.
Source: Unsplash We all have a set of values that guide us, but sometimes the things we believe don’t line up with those values. Maybe you’ve got beliefs about success or how relationships should look, but deep down, they don’t actually reflect who you are or what you care about. That inner conflict can really mess with your peace of mind. Take a moment to look at your beliefs and see if they’re aligned with your core values. If they’re not, it might be time to let go of the ones that don’t serve who you truly want to be.
8. Think about how it makes you feel.
Source: Unsplash This one’s pretty simple. How does your belief make you feel on a day-to-day basis? Does it empower you or hold you back? We all carry beliefs that cause us anxiety, guilt, or even shame without realising it. If a belief makes you feel lousy, it’s worth considering whether it’s serving you at all. A healthy belief should lift you up, not weigh you down. If it’s causing negative emotions consistently, it’s time to take a good hard look at why you’re holding onto it.
9. Look for evidence to back it up.
A belief that’s worth holding onto should have some solid evidence behind it. If you can’t find anything that actually supports what you believe, then it might be more of a guess or assumption than something grounded in reality. Look for studies, real-life examples, or just plain facts to support your belief. If you can’t find any, or what you do find contradicts it, that’s a big clue. Beliefs should be supported by facts, not just feelings.
10. Ask yourself who benefits from it.
Source: Unsplash This one’s key. Some beliefs get passed down because they serve certain people or institutions. Think about whether your belief is helping you or if it’s helping other people keep control over you. For example, some beliefs are set up to discourage people from questioning authority or to keep certain societal norms intact. If you notice your belief seems to benefit someone else more than you, it’s time to question whether it’s actually serving you or just reinforcing a system that doesn’t benefit you.
11. Test it in real life.
Source: Unsplash Sometimes the best way to see if a belief holds up is to just test it out. That doesn’t mean doing something extreme, but simply putting it into practice and observing what happens. For instance, if you’ve always believed you’re bad at something, try it again with a new mindset and see if the outcome changes. Life can often show you that your old beliefs weren’t as solid as they seemed. Testing them in the real world helps you separate what’s real from what you’ve simply accepted.
12. Notice if it creates division.
Source: Unsplash Some beliefs create “us vs. them” dynamics, and that’s usually a sign that it’s not helping anyone. Sure, some beliefs are divisive, but when it encourages judgement, exclusion, or hostility, that’s a red flag. A belief that divides people rarely leads to growth or positive change. On the other hand, beliefs that promote empathy, understanding, and connection will bring people together. Ask yourself: does this belief make me more open-minded or less? The right beliefs should create unity, not division.
13. Be open to changing your mind.
Source: Unsplash Finally, one of the hardest things to do is admit that we were wrong about something. But being able to change your mind is one of the most powerful ways to grow. It doesn’t make you weak—it makes you adaptable. As you go through life, your understanding of things will evolve. Stay open to shifting your beliefs as you learn and experience more. Letting go of outdated beliefs is a sign of strength, not weakness. It’s about moving forward with new insights and fresh perspectives.
