How To Handle The Angry Backlash Of A Narcissist

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Dealing with a narcissist’s retaliation when you’ve crossed them (or simply stopped putting up with them) is no walk in the park.

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It can be emotionally draining, frustrating, and downright infuriating. But here’s the thing: you don’t have to let their tantrums and manipulative tactics control your life. By arming yourself with the right strategies and mindset, you can navigate these stormy waters without losing your cool or compromising your well-being. Here are some tips to get you through.

1. Don’t engage in the drama.

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When a narcissist lashes out, your first instinct might be to fight back or defend yourself. Don’t fall into that trap. Engaging in their drama only fuels the fire and gives them the attention they crave. Instead, practice the art of detachment. Keep your responses minimal, neutral, and boring. Gray rock the heck out of them. Remember, you don’t owe them a reaction, and your peace of mind is worth more than winning an argument with someone who plays by their own twisted rules.

2. Set and enforce clear boundaries.

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Narcissists love pushing buttons and crossing lines. That’s why it’s crucial to establish firm boundaries and stick to them like glue. Communicate your limits clearly and calmly, without room for interpretation. If they violate a boundary, call them out on it without hesitation. Don’t make excuses for their behaviour or let them guilt-trip you into backing down. Your boundaries are non-negotiable, and enforcing them consistently shows the narcissist that you mean business.

3. Prioritize your own well-being.

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Dealing with a narcissist’s angry outbursts can take a serious toll on your mental and emotional health. That’s why it’s essential to make self-care a top priority. Carve out time for activities that bring you joy, peace, and relaxation. Surround yourself with supportive people who have your back. Seek therapy if needed to process your emotions and develop coping strategies. Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup, so take care of yourself first and foremost.

4. Document everything.

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Narcissists are master manipulators who love to twist reality to suit their narrative. That’s why it’s crucial to keep a record of their behaviour. Save any abusive messages, emails, or voicemails they send you. Write down incidents with dates, times, and witnesses. Having concrete evidence can be a lifesaver if you ever need to take legal action or seek a restraining order. Plus, it helps you maintain a clear perspective when the narcissist tries to gaslight you into doubting your own perceptions.

5. Know when to walk away.

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Sometimes, despite your best efforts, a narcissist’s anger and toxicity may become too much to handle. If you’ve tried setting boundaries, detaching, and protecting your well-being, but the situation continues to deteriorate, it may be time to consider walking away. Whether it’s ending a relationship, cutting ties with a family member, or leaving a toxic work environment, remember that your safety and sanity come first. It’s not easy, but surrounding yourself with people who treat you with respect and kindness is worth it in the long run.