Being an extrovert doesn’t mean you always have to be the life of the party.
Sometimes, toning it down a notch can be a good thing for both you and everyone around you. Whether you’re looking to adapt to quieter settings or just want to give people a bit more space, here are some tips to help you balance your outgoing nature with a touch of calm (because some people could really use it).
1. Practise active listening more often.
Instead of always jumping in with your thoughts, try focusing on really hearing what other people are saying. Give them your full attention, nod along, and resist the urge to interrupt. You might be surprised by how much you learn when you’re not busy thinking about what you’ll say next.
2. Count to five before speaking in group settings.
In meetings or social gatherings, give yourself a mental countdown before chiming in. This pause gives other people the chance to speak up and helps you avoid dominating the conversation. It’s not about silencing yourself, just creating space for a more balanced dialogue.
3. Embrace the power of a good cuppa.
When you feel the need to chat, try having a cup of tea instead. The ritual of brewing and sipping can give you a moment of calm and reflection. Plus, holding a mug gives your hands something to do if you’re feeling fidgety.
4. Start a journaling habit.
Channel some of your thoughts and energy into writing. Keeping a journal provides an outlet for your ideas and feelings without always vocalising them. It’s a great way to process your experiences privately before sharing them with anyone else.
5. Take up a solo hobby.
Source: Unsplash Find an activity you enjoy that doesn’t involve constant interaction. Whether it’s gardening, painting, or building model aeroplanes, having a quiet pursuit can help balance your social tendencies and give you some peaceful alone time.
6. Try a bit of mindfulness or meditation.
Source: Unsplash Spending a few minutes each day in quiet reflection can help calm your mind and reduce the urge to fill every silence. Start small with guided meditations and work your way up to longer periods of stillness.
7. Use the ‘two-ear, one-mouth’ rule.
Remind yourself that you have two ears and one mouth for a reason. Try to listen twice as much as you speak. This approach can help you become more observant and give other people more opportunity to express themselves.
8. Learn to appreciate comfortable silences.
Not every moment needs to be filled with chatter. Practise being okay with quiet moments in conversations. These pauses can be refreshing and allow for deeper connections without constant verbal exchange.
9. Set ‘quiet time’ goals for yourself.
Challenge yourself to have periods of reduced talking throughout the day. Start small, maybe 15 minutes, and gradually increase. Use this time to observe your surroundings or focus on a task without verbal commentary.
10. Develop your non-verbal communication skills.
Work on expressing yourself through facial expressions, gestures, and body language. This can help you connect with people without always relying on words, and it’s a valuable skill in many social and professional settings.
11. Choose your battles wisely.
Before launching into a debate or sharing an opinion, ask yourself if it’s really necessary. Sometimes, letting things go or agreeing to disagree can create a more peaceful atmosphere than always voicing your thoughts.
12. Practise empathy more consciously.
Try to put yourself in other people’s shoes before speaking. This can help you gauge whether your input is needed or if someone just needs a listening ear. Empathy can guide you towards more thoughtful and less frequent contributions to conversations.
13. Use technology to your advantage.
When you feel the urge to share something immediately, try texting a friend or jotting it down in a notes app instead. This can satisfy your need to express yourself without always vocalising your thoughts in the moment.
14. Embrace the art of the subtle contribution.
Instead of making grand statements or long speeches, practise making concise, thoughtful comments. A well-timed, brief observation can be just as impactful as a lengthy monologue.
15. Remember, it’s okay to be yourself.
While these tips can help you tone things down when needed, don’t feel pressured to completely change who you are. Your extroverted nature is part of your charm. The goal is to find a balance that works for you and those around you, not to suppress your personality entirely.
