We all have those moments where we catch ourselves being a little too self-focused.
It’s no big deal, generally — it happens to the best of us! But if you feel like your world often revolves a bit too tightly around you, don’t worry – there are plenty of ways to shift that focus outward and become a more thoughtful, considerate, and well-rounded person. Here are some tips to help you break free from the self-centredness trap and cultivate deeper, more meaningful connections with the people around you.
1. Tune in and listen when people speak.
Instead of waiting for your turn to talk, truly listen to what people have to say. Put your phone down, make eye contact, and focus on their words. Ask follow-up questions to show you’re engaged and genuinely interested in their thoughts and feelings. Active listening is a powerful tool for building empathy and understanding.
2. Be genuinely interested in other people’s lives.
Don’t just talk about yourself all the time. Ask your friends, family, and colleagues about their lives, their interests, and their challenges. Be curious and open-minded. Celebrate their successes, empathise with their struggles, and offer your support. By showing genuine interest in people, you’ll not only make them feel valued, but you’ll also learn and grow from their experiences.
3. Offer help and support without having to be asked.
Be proactive in offering your assistance to anyone who needs it. Whether it’s helping a friend move, picking up groceries for an elderly neighbour, or simply offering a listening ear, small acts of kindness can go a long way in building stronger relationships and making a positive impact on the world around you. Don’t wait to be asked; look for opportunities to help and make their lives better/easier.
4. Practice gratitude and appreciation.
Source: Unsplash Take time each day to reflect on the things you’re grateful for. Whether it’s your health, your loved ones, or simply the beauty of nature, focusing on the positive aspects of your life can help you cultivate a more appreciative and less self-centred mindset. Express your gratitude people, let them know how much you value their presence in your life, and show appreciation for their contributions, big or small.
5. Volunteer your time and resources.
Giving back to your community is a powerful way to shift your focus from yourself to other people. Whether it’s volunteering at a local shelter, donating to a charity, or simply helping a friend in need, contributing to something bigger than yourself can give you a sense of purpose and fulfilment. It can also help you develop empathy and compassion for people, as you learn about their struggles and challenges.
6. Learn to apologise and take responsibility for your actions.
Everyone makes mistakes. When you mess up, own it and apologise sincerely. Don’t make excuses or try to shift the blame. Taking responsibility for your actions shows maturity and respect. It also helps you learn from your mistakes and become a better person.
7. Work on upping your empathy and compassion.
Try to put yourself in other people’s shoes and understand their perspectives. Imagine how they might be feeling, what challenges they might be facing, and what their needs might be. Practice active listening and try to see things from their point of view. Empathy and compassion are essential for building strong, meaningful relationships and contributing to a more positive and supportive community.
8. Learn to be happy for other people’s wins.
Don’t let jealousy or envy get in the way of celebrating people’s achievements. When someone you know succeeds, be genuinely happy for them. Offer your congratulations, express your support, and celebrate their wins as if they were your own. By focusing on the positive and being happy when other people succeed, you’ll create a more uplifting and supportive environment for everyone.
9. Remember the little details that matter to people.
Pay attention to their preferences, their likes and dislikes, their quirks, and their dreams. Remember their favourite coffee order, their birthday, their anniversary, and the little things that make them happy. This attentiveness shows them that you value them and their individuality.
10. Surprise them with small acts of kindness.
You don’t need a special occasion to show your love and appreciation. Leave them a sweet note on the bathroom mirror, bring them their favourite snack, or surprise them with a small gift just because. These little gestures of kindness brighten their day and remind them of how much you care.
11. Prioritise quality time together.
Source: Unsplash In the hustle and bustle of daily life, you make sure to carve out time for just the two of you. Whether it’s a date night, a weekend getaway, or simply cuddling on the couch and watching a film, m time to connect with your partner, friends, and family members, and strengthen your bond. This dedicated time together shows them that they are a priority in your life.
12. Respect their individuality and encourage people’s passions.
Support people’s dreams, interests, and hobbies, even if they differ from your own. Encourage them to pursue their passions, cheer them on when they succeed, and offer a listening ear when they face challenges. Understand that their individuality is what makes them special, and you cherish it.
13. Be willing to go the extra mile.
Don’t just do the bare minimum in your relationships — go above and beyond to make the people who matter to you feel loved, appreciated, and supported. Surprise them with a hot chocolate on a cold day, pick up their favourite takeaway on your way home, or simply offer to take care of a task they’re dreading. These small acts of service show that you’re willing to go the extra mile for their happiness.
14. Be their biggest fan and advocate.
Believe in the people in your life wholeheartedly and want nothing but the best for them. Defend them against criticism, offer support when they doubt themselves, and celebrate their achievements with genuine enthusiasm. Be their partner in crime, their confidant, and their biggest supporter, always cheering them on from the sidelines.
15. Make them feel safe and secure.
Source: Unsplash Create a safe space for the people you love to be themselves, free from judgment or criticism. Listen to their concerns, validate their feelings, and offer unconditional support. Make them feel like they can trust you with their heart, their dreams, and their vulnerabilities. Your presence should bring them comfort and security, knowing that they have someone who will always have their back.
