Some people don’t even have to put in any effort — they’re just naturally likeable.
They don’t try too hard, and they’re always their authentic selves. And while those two things alone carry them a long way, they have some other habits that help endear them to everyone we meet. If you want to adopt some of them for yourself, here’s what you should do.
1. Zip your lips and listen to people.
Source: Unsplash We all love to talk about ourselves, but truly likeable people know how to listen. Put down your phone, make eye contact, and actively engage in the conversation. Ask thoughtful questions, show empathy, and let the other person know that you value their thoughts and opinions. Being a good listener makes people feel heard and appreciated, and helps you connect on a deeper level.
2. Be genuinely interested in what people have to say/what’s going on in their lives.
People are naturally drawn to those who show genuine interest in their lives. Ask about their day, their interests, their passions. Remember details about their stories and follow up in future conversations. When you show that you care about what’s going on in their world, you create a sense of warmth and connection that makes you more likeable.
3. Give sincere compliments.
A genuine compliment can brighten someone’s day and make them feel valued. Notice the little things – a new haircut, a well-done project, a kind gesture – and express your appreciation. Avoid generic compliments and focus on specific details that show you’ve been paying attention. Sincere compliments build rapport and make you more memorable.
4. Smile and make eye contact, even if you feel a bit awkward.
Source: Pexels A warm smile and direct eye contact are powerful tools for building rapport. They convey friendliness, openness, and confidence. When you smile and make eye contact, you create an instant connection with the other person, making them feel comfortable and at ease in your presence. Remember, a smile is contagious, so spread the positivity!
5. Use people’s names.
Source: Unsplash Our names are a fundamental part of our identity, and hearing them spoken makes us feel acknowledged and valued. Make an effort to remember and use people’s names in conversation. It shows that you’re paying attention and that they matter to you. A simple “Nice to meet you, [name]” or “How’s it going, [name]?” can go a long way in building rapport.
6. Be positive and enthusiastic (but avoid going overboard).
Source: Unsplash Positive energy is infectious. People are naturally drawn to those who radiate optimism and enthusiasm. Focus on the good things in life, share your passions, and express your excitement about the things that matter to you. A positive attitude is contagious and makes you more enjoyable to be around.
7. Show a bit of appreciation.
Source: Unsplash Expressing gratitude is a simple yet powerful way to build strong relationships. Take the time to thank people for their help, their kindness, or their presence in your life. A heartfelt “thank you” shows that you value their contributions and appreciate their efforts. Gratitude creates positive feelings and strengthens bonds.
8. Be authentic and genuine.
Source: Unsplash People can sense when someone is being fake or insincere. Be yourself, embrace your quirks, and let your true personality shine through. Authenticity is magnetic and draws people in. When you’re genuine, you build trust and create more meaningful relationships.
9. Let yourself be vulnerable sometimes.
Source: Unsplash Sharing your vulnerabilities, fears, and struggles can create a deeper connection with people. It shows that you’re human, relatable, and willing to let your guard down. When you share your imperfections, you create a safe space for everyone else to do the same, encouraging trust and understanding. Of course, vulnerability should be shared in appropriate settings and with people you trust, but it can be a powerful tool for building meaningful relationships.
10. Be helpful and supportive.
Source: Unsplash Offering a helping hand or a listening ear goes a long way in making you more likeable. People appreciate those who are willing to lend a hand, offer support, or simply be there for them when they need it. Whether it’s helping a friend move, offering advice, or simply being a shoulder to cry on, your willingness to help people shows your kindness and compassion.
11. Stay open-minded and non-judgmental.
Source: Unsplash Everyone has different opinions and perspectives, and being open-minded is key to building positive relationships. Listen to different viewpoints, respect diverse opinions, and avoid judging people for their beliefs or choices. When you create a safe and accepting environment, people feel more comfortable opening up to you, creating deeper connections.
12. Be a good storyteller.
Source: Unsplash Sharing interesting stories and anecdotes can make you more engaging and memorable. People love to be entertained, and a well-told story can capture their attention and spark their imagination. Practice your storytelling skills, focus on details that create vivid imagery, and use humour to keep your audience engaged. A good storyteller is always welcome in any social setting.
13. Keep your body language in check.
Source: Unsplash Your body language speaks volumes about your confidence and approachability. Stand tall, maintain good posture, and use open gestures. Avoid crossing your arms, fidgeting, or looking down, as these can signal disinterest or nervousness. A confident and open body language makes you more approachable and inviting.
14. Be willing to laugh at yourself.
Source: Unsplash Taking yourself too seriously can be a turn-off. Being able to laugh at your own mistakes and shortcomings shows that you’re self-aware and have a good sense of humour. People are drawn to those who don’t take themselves too seriously and can embrace their imperfections. A little self-deprecating humour can go a long way in making you more relatable and likeable.
15. Be happy for people when they achieve something.
Source: Unsplash Being genuinely happy for other people’s achievements is a sign of maturity and generosity. Celebrate their wins, offer congratulations, and show your support. Avoid envy or jealousy, as these negative emotions can be off-putting. When you celebrate other people’s wins, you create a positive and uplifting atmosphere that makes you more likeable.
16. Be reliable and trustworthy.
Source: Unsplash Being dependable and trustworthy is the foundation of any strong relationship. Keep your promises, follow through on commitments, and be someone people can rely on. When people know they can count on you, they’ll naturally gravitate towards you. Trustworthiness is a valuable trait that takes time to build, but is essential for creating lasting connections.
