Family’s supposed to be our rock, right? The ones who have our backs no matter what. But sometimes, that’s not the reality. It’s tough to admit, but there are times when family doesn’t act like family. If you’re feeling like you’re not a priority in your family’s life, here are some signs that might confirm your suspicions.
1. They don’t make time for you.
They’re always too busy, or they cancel plans at the last minute. They might forget important dates like your birthday or only reach out when they need something from you. It feels like they don’t prioritise you in their lives, and no matter how much effort you put in to bridge the gap, nothing ever changes.
2. They don’t listen to you.
When you talk, it’s like they’re not even there. They interrupt you, dismiss your concerns, or change the subject. It feels like your thoughts and feelings don’t matter to them. They might even talk over you or make jokes at your expense. Even when you try to communicate how hurtful their behaviour is, it goes in one ear and out the other.
3. They don’t offer support.
When you’re going through a tough time, they’re nowhere to be found. They don’t offer a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, or practical help. It feels like you’re facing life’s challenges alone, without the support system you need. When you do manage to communicate what you’re struggling with, they downplay the situation and tell you to grow up and get on with it.
4. They criticise and judge you.
Instead of building you up, they tear you down. They criticise your choices, judge your lifestyle, or make you feel like you’re not good enough. They might even compare you to other people, making you feel inferior or inadequate. Nothing is ever good enough for them, and it’s completely demoralising.
5. They’re never there for your celebrations or achievements.
When you have something to celebrate, they don’t seem interested. They might not show up for your graduation, your wedding, or other important milestones. It feels like they don’t care about your successes or happiness.
6. They make you feel guilty or obligated.
They use guilt trips, emotional blackmail, or other manipulative tactics to get you to do what they want. They might make you feel guilty for setting boundaries, for pursuing your own dreams, or for simply living your life on your own terms.
7. They don’t respect your boundaries.
They invade your privacy, overstep your limits, or disregard your wishes. They might expect you to always be available for them, even when it’s inconvenient for you. It feels like they don’t respect your autonomy or your right to make your own choices.
8. They create drama and conflict.
They thrive on drama and create conflict wherever they go. They might start arguments, spread rumours, or pit family members against each other. Their presence is often accompanied by stress, anxiety, and tension.
9. They don’t apologise or take responsibility for their actions.
They might hurt your feelings or make mistakes, but they never apologise or own up to their actions. They might blame you, others, or external circumstances for their behaviour. This lack of accountability can be frustrating and damaging to the relationship.
10. They make you feel like a burden or an inconvenience.
They might act like your needs are too demanding, your problems are trivial, or your presence is an inconvenience. They might not offer help when you need it or make you feel like you’re asking for too much. This can leave you feeling unloved and unsupported.
11. They don’t celebrate your successes or accomplishments.
They might downplay your achievements, ignore your milestones, or act indifferent to your successes. It feels like they’re not happy for you or proud of your accomplishments.
12. They don’t offer you emotional support or validation.
They might not be there to listen to your problems, offer a comforting hug, or validate your feelings. They might dismiss your emotions or tell you to “just get over it.”
13. They make you feel like you’re walking on eggshells.
You constantly feel like you have to censor yourself or walk on eggshells around them, afraid of saying or doing something that might upset them or trigger their anger or disapproval.
