Life is unfair sometimes — that’s just how it goes, and mature adults know that.
However, we all know that one person who throws tantrums, sulks when they don’t get their way, or resorts to childish behaviour when things don’t go as planned. Dealing with a fully grown adult acting like a stroppy toddler can be frustrating, but how you respond makes all the difference in how much of your sanity you retain. Instead of getting dragged into their drama, here’s how to handle it without losing your patience (or your mind).
1. Don’t feed into the drama.
Petulant behaviour thrives on attention. The more you react emotionally, the more they’ll push their childish antics to get a bigger response. They want you to rise to the bait, so don’t give them the satisfaction. Instead, stay calm and neutral. If they’re throwing a tantrum, let them. They’ll soon realise they’re not getting the reaction they were hoping for, and without that, their behaviour loses its power.
2. Set clear boundaries — and stick to them.
Some people act like overgrown toddlers because they’ve never been told their behaviour isn’t acceptable. If someone is being childish, manipulative, or unreasonable, make it clear that you’re not entertaining it. Try saying, “I’m happy to talk when you’re ready to have a real conversation, but I’m not engaging with this.” Setting boundaries lets them know that their behaviour won’t get them what they want.
3. Stay calm, even when they’re not.
When someone is pouting, shouting, or storming off, it’s tempting to match their energy and snap right back. But if you stay calm while they lose their cool, it forces them to see who’s really being unreasonable. Think of it this way: if one person is throwing a tantrum and the other is staying composed, only one of them looks ridiculous, and it’s not you.
4. Call out their behaviour without being rude.
Sometimes, people don’t even realise they’re acting like a petulant child. Pointing it out without being nasty about it can snap them back into reality. Try saying something along the lines of, “You’re getting really worked up over this — can we take a second and talk like adults?” It flips the focus back to them, and makes them more aware of how they’re acting.
5. Refuse to engage in passive-aggressive games.
Silent treatment, sarcastic remarks, exaggerated sighs — they’re all classic moves in the petulant behaviour playbook. The worst thing you can do is play along. If someone is being passive-aggressive, address it head-on. “If something’s bothering you, just say it. I don’t do passive-aggressive.” It forces them to either communicate properly or drop the act.
6. Offer them a way to save face.
Some people dig themselves into a tantrum and don’t know how to back out of it. If you give them an “exit” without making them feel embarrassed, they’re more likely to calm down. Instead of saying, “You’re acting ridiculous,” try something like, “I get that you’re upset — let’s take a break and talk when we’re both in a better headspace.” It lets them reset without feeling called out.
7. Don’t reward their behaviour.
If someone throws a strop and gets what they want, they’ll do it again. Don’t give in just to keep the peace — otherwise, you’re training them to keep acting this way. If they’re sulking because they didn’t get their way, don’t rush to “fix” it. Let them sit in their mood for a bit. They’ll either get over it or realise their tactics don’t work on you.
8. Keep your own emotions in check.
Dealing with someone acting like a brat can be infuriating, but the moment you let it get under your skin, they win. They want a reaction, and if you give them one, you’re just feeding into the cycle. Take a deep breath, remind yourself that their behaviour isn’t your problem, and keep your cool. It’s harder for them to keep acting childish when you’re not playing along.
9. Give them space if they need it.
Some people just need a moment to self-correct. If they’re having a full-on sulk, walking away and giving them space might be the best option. Say something like, “I’ll be here when you’re ready to talk.” Then step back. When they realise they’re not getting the response they wanted, they’ll probably drop the act faster.
10. Don’t let them guilt-trip you.
Some people use childish behaviour as a form of manipulation — sulking, acting hurt, or making you feel like you did something wrong just because they didn’t get what they wanted. Don’t fall for it. Remind yourself that you’re not responsible for their emotions. You can acknowledge how they feel without taking on the guilt. “I understand you’re upset, but that doesn’t mean I did something wrong,” or something along those lines, should work fine.
11. Encourage actual communication.
If they’re throwing a tantrum instead of just saying what’s wrong, try nudging them in the right direction. Some people resort to childish behaviour because they don’t know how to express frustration like an adult. Say something like, “If something’s wrong, I’d rather just talk about it instead of playing guessing games.” If they’re open to it, it might actually lead to a proper conversation.
12. Know when to walk away completely.
Not everyone is willing to act like an adult, and if someone consistently behaves this way, you don’t have to stick around. Whether it’s a friend, a partner, or a colleague, you’re not obligated to entertain someone who refuses to act their age. If their behaviour is constant and exhausting, walking away might be the best thing you can do for your own peace of mind. Not every situation needs fixing — sometimes, you just need to remove yourself from the chaos.
13. Keep perspective — it’s their problem, not yours.
At the end of the day, how someone else acts isn’t your responsibility. If they want to throw tantrums, sulk, or act like a child, that’s on them — you don’t have to be dragged into it. Remind yourself: mature people don’t act like this. And if someone is behaving childishly, it’s a reflection of them, not you.
14. Lead by example.
Sometimes, the best way to deal with childish behaviour is to show them what acting like an adult looks like. Stay calm, be direct, and don’t stoop to their level. By handling the situation maturely, you set the tone for the interaction. And if they still want to act like a petulant child? They’ll have to deal with that on their own because you won’t be sticking around to put up with it anymore.
