16 ‘Observations’ Armchair Psychologists Make About People That Are Usually Wrong

Javier Sánchez Mingorance

Some people act like they’ve got a Ph.D. in psychology and can read people like a book.

Javier Sánchez Mingorance

And while you don’t necessarily need a fancy degree to be observant, the armchair psychologists of the world are obsessed with forming baseless opinions of people and situations based on, well, nothing at all. Here are some of the “clever” things they think they see in people that are usually wildly off-base.

1. “She’s organised, must be OCD.”

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Being neat or enjoying order doesn’t mean someone has obsessive-compulsive disorder. People with OCD deal with intrusive thoughts and compulsions that disrupt their daily lives, often causing immense anxiety. Liking a clean desk or a colour-coded planner isn’t the same thing. Jumping to this conclusion not only trivialises the struggles of people with OCD but also undermines the importance of understanding the condition for what it really is.

2. “He’s quiet, must be antisocial.”

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Being reserved or introverted is worlds apart from having antisocial tendencies. Some people simply enjoy peace and their own company without any desire to harm or disregard societal norms. True antisocial behaviour involves a pattern of manipulation or disregard for other people’s rights. Just because someone skips the party doesn’t mean they’re plotting a heist—it might just mean they’d rather stay home with a good book.

3. “They’re moody, must be bipolar.”

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Feeling emotional highs and lows doesn’t automatically equal bipolar disorder. That mental health condition is characterised by distinct, prolonged episodes of mania and depression that significantly impact daily functioning. Normal mood changes are part of life—they’re fleeting and often triggered by external factors. Misusing terms like this stigmatises bipolar disorder and oversimplifies how complex human emotions really are.

4. “She’s confident, must be a narcissist.”

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There’s a big difference between having self-esteem and being narcissistic. Narcissistic behaviour involves a consistent pattern of entitlement, lack of empathy, and exploiting people for personal gain. Someone who’s self-assured, celebrates their wins, or enjoys recognition isn’t automatically self-absorbed. Confident people often inspire and encourage everyone around them, whereas narcissists use people as props in their own story.

5. “He’s detail-oriented, must be a perfectionist.”

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Liking precision or wanting to do a job well doesn’t mean someone is struggling with perfectionism. Clinical perfectionism involves a crippling fear of making mistakes and unrealistic expectations that cause significant stress. People who pay attention to detail might just enjoy thoroughness—it’s a skill, not a disorder. Mistaking careful work for an unhealthy obsession ignores the real challenges perfectionists face.

6. “They’re sad, must be depressed.”

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Feeling sad after a bad day or tough situation is normal and usually temporary. Depression, on the other hand, involves long-lasting symptoms like changes in energy, sleep, and motivation that can make even simple tasks feel impossible. Labelling every low mood as depression trivialises the very real experience of people who live with this condition.

7. “She’s talkative, must have ADHD.”

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Being chatty doesn’t automatically point to ADHD. This neurodevelopmental condition affects attention, impulse control, and executive function across various areas of life—not just conversation style. ADHD impacts much more than how much someone talks; it’s about how they process, organise, and manage their daily lives.

8. “He likes order, must be type A.”

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The whole “Type A/Type B” personality idea has been debunked as an oversimplification of human behaviour. People who are driven or enjoy structure aren’t part of some rigid personality type—they’re just expressing individual traits. Human behaviour exists on a spectrum, not in neatly labelled boxes.

9. “They’re anxious, must have trauma.”

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While anxiety can sometimes stem from past trauma, it’s not always the case. Anxiety has a range of causes, including genetics, brain chemistry, and current life circumstances. Jumping to conclusions about someone’s past just because they seem nervous or worried isn’t fair and can prevent deeper understanding of what’s really going on for them.

10. “She’s assertive, must be overcompensating.”

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Confident communication doesn’t always need a hidden explanation. People who are assertive are often just comfortable expressing their needs and boundaries—it doesn’t mean they’re masking insecurities. Assuming confidence is overcompensation dismisses the idea that someone can simply be self-assured without strings attached.

11. “He’s private, must be hiding something.”

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Some people value their privacy, full stop. It doesn’t mean they’re keeping secrets or acting suspiciously—they might just prefer to keep certain parts of their lives to themselves. Respecting personal boundaries doesn’t need a psychological explanation, and not everyone wants to live out loud.

12. “They’re successful, must be workaholic.”

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Achieving big goals doesn’t necessarily mean someone’s addicted to work. Many successful people have learned how to balance their ambitions with rest, relationships, and self-care. True workaholism is compulsive and often harms both mental and physical health. Hard work doesn’t always come at the expense of well-being.

13. “She’s single, must be afraid of commitment.”

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Being single doesn’t automatically point to an underlying fear or issue. People have countless reasons for choosing to be on their own, whether it’s focusing on personal growth, pursuing a career, or simply waiting for the right connection. Commitment isn’t everyone’s top priority, and that’s perfectly valid.

14. “He’s sensitive, must have low self-esteem.”

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Sensitivity isn’t always rooted in insecurity. Some people are naturally more attuned to their emotions or the emotions of those around them, and that can be a strength. It often reflects high emotional intelligence, which helps them navigate relationships and situations with empathy and insight. Sensitivity and self-esteem aren’t opposites—they can absolutely coexist, and being in touch with emotions doesn’t make someone less confident.

15. “They’re different, must be attention-seeking.”

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Standing out or marching to the beat of your own drum isn’t always about grabbing attention. Some people genuinely prefer a unique style, way of thinking, or lifestyle because it aligns with who they are—not because they’re craving validation. Being authentic might look “different” to some, but it’s not a plea for approval.

16. “She’s friendly, must be covering insecurity.”

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Kindness and friendliness don’t automatically mask a hidden struggle. Some people simply enjoy connecting with people, brightening someone’s day, or spreading positivity. Assuming there’s always a deeper, less flattering reason behind someone’s warmth dismisses the idea that some behaviours can just come from a good place with no ulterior motive.