Our pets aren’t just fun accessories — they’re integral parts of our family.
When they pass away, the grief is real, and it can be just as intense as losing a human member of your pack. While the pain is something you’ll have to process and work through in your own time, there are some practical tips that can make the process slightly less stressful — as well as aiding in the healing process.
1. Give yourself permission to grieve.
First things first — this loss is real and major, no matter what anyone else might say about it being “just a pet.” Don’t let anyone minimise your grief or rush you through it. The bond you shared was unique, and your feelings are completely valid. Take the time you need to feel your emotions, even if that means taking a day off work or saying no to social plans.
2. Handle the immediate practicalities.
If your pet passed at home, you’ll need to decide about their remains fairly quickly. Most vets and animal hospitals can help with this, offering options like individual cremation or communal services. Don’t feel pressured into making permanent decisions right away — many places will store remains while you decide what feels right. Remember, there’s no wrong choice here — just what works for you and your family.
3. Tell your other pets.
This might sound strange to non-pet people, but your other animals need to understand why their friend isn’t coming back. Let them see and sniff their departed companion if possible — it helps them process the loss, too. Watch for signs of depression or anxiety in your surviving pets. They grieve too, and might need extra attention and patience in the coming weeks.
4. Remove supplies thoughtfully.
Don’t rush to clear out everything immediately — seeing their empty food bowl or favourite bed might be hard, but rushing to erase all traces can feel even worse later. Pack things away gradually when you’re ready. Consider donating unused supplies to a local shelter — helping other animals can be healing. Keep a few special items if you want to — there’s no timeline for this.
5. Inform your support circle.
Let close friends, family, and even your workplace know what’s happened. You’ll need support, and people can’t help if they don’t know. Be clear about what you need — whether it’s space, company, or help with practical matters. Those who’ve lost pets understand, and even those who haven’t can still offer comfort.
6. Create a memorial.
Find a way to honour your pet that feels right to you. Maybe it’s framing a favourite photo, creating a memory box, or planting a tree in their favourite spot in the yard. Some people find comfort in making a donation to an animal charity in their pet’s name. The memorial doesn’t have to be elaborate — it just needs to feel meaningful to you.
7. Handle the paperwork.
Cancel any recurring deliveries of food or medications. Update their microchip registration if applicable. Let your vet know, so they can update their records. These tasks might feel mechanical, but they’re necessary and can help provide closure. Keep their medical records — you never know when the information might be helpful for future pets.
8. Find a support group.
Pet loss support groups exist both online and in many communities. Sometimes sharing with people who truly understand can help ease the pain. These groups can offer practical advice too, from memorial ideas to coping strategies. You’re not alone in this, even if it feels that way right now.
9. Be gentle with yourself.
There’s no timeline for grief, and pet loss can hit just as hard as losing a human family member. Don’t feel guilty about crying, staying home, or needing time to adjust. Your daily routine will feel different without them — that’s normal and okay. Give yourself grace as you navigate this new normal.
10. Consider future pets carefully.
Some people want a new pet right away, while others need months or years before they’re ready. Neither approach is wrong. Don’t let anyone pressure you into getting another pet before you’re ready, and don’t feel guilty if you do want another pet soon. Your departed friend would want you to be happy, whatever that looks like for you.
