When you don’t like someone, it’s not always easy (or appropriate) to come out and tell them so.
Most people want to avoid awkwardness and keep the peace, so they’ll try to paste a smile on their face and pretend that things are just fine. However, if any of these things are happening, it’s very clear that they don’t actually find you very appealing. That doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you, of course — you can’t be everyone’s cup of tea!
1. They avoid eye contact.
Eye contact is one of the easiest ways to connect with someone, so when it’s noticeably absent, it says a lot. If someone is constantly looking past you or keeping their eyes fixed elsewhere, it can feel like they’re shutting you out. This isn’t about being shy—avoiding eye contact for extended periods often conveys discomfort or a lack of interest in the interaction.
2. Their body language feels closed off.
Crossed arms, leaning away, or even turning slightly to the side are classic signs of someone putting up a wall. Body language is often subconscious, and these small shifts can create a feeling of distance. If their gestures don’t mirror yours, or they seem physically detached, it’s a good indicator they’re not keen on deepening the connection.
3. They give one-word responses.
When someone replies with “Yeah,” “Fine,” or “Okay,” and leaves it at that, they’re likely not invested in the conversation. Short, curt answers can be a polite way of keeping things moving without showing genuine interest. It’s a way to end the interaction quickly without coming across as rude.
4. They don’t ask personal questions.
If someone doesn’t seem curious about your life, it’s a clear sign they’re not trying to build a connection. Conversations that feel one-sided, where you’re doing all the asking, can quickly grow frustrating. When someone likes you, they naturally want to know more—about your interests, your thoughts, or even just how your day went.
5. They always seem distracted.
Constantly checking their phone, glancing around the room, or focusing on anything but you sends a pretty strong message. It’s not just a bad habit; it’s a clear sign that their attention is elsewhere. Feeling like you’re competing for their focus can make interactions feel cold and unwelcoming.
6. They rarely smile around you.
Smiling is an easy, unconscious way to show warmth and friendliness, so when it’s absent, it can feel a bit frosty. A neutral or blank expression during most of your interactions suggests they’re not particularly enjoying your company. Genuine smiles are hard to fake, and their absence speaks volumes about how comfortable (or not) someone feels around you.
7. They don’t initiate contact.
If you’re always the one texting, calling, or suggesting plans, it’s worth noticing. Relationships of any kind thrive on mutual effort, and when it’s always one-sided, it can be exhausting. When someone wants to spend time with you, they’ll find ways to make it happen—they won’t leave it all up to you.
8. They keep conversations surface-level.
Talking about the weather or how busy work has been isn’t inherently bad, but if it’s all they ever discuss, it’s a sign they’re not interested in a deeper connection. Engaging conversations often go beyond the small stuff, touching on personal experiences, feelings, or opinions. If that never happens, it’s likely intentional.
9. They seem impatient around you.
If they’re shifting in their seat, checking the time, or cutting the conversation short, they’re sending a clear sign they’d rather be elsewhere. Impatience during a chat can make you feel like a burden, even if they’re not outright saying so. Someone who enjoys your company will make the time feel effortless, not rushed.
10. They don’t remember things about you.
When someone forgets your name, job, or the fact that you told them about your holiday plans twice already, it can feel like they’re not listening. Forgetting key details about you isn’t just an accident—it often shows they’re not paying attention in the first place. People who care about you remember the little things.
11. They’re overly formal or distant.
When someone keeps interactions stiff and overly polite, it can feel like they’re maintaining a professional distance—even in casual settings. Friendlier relationships usually feature relaxed, easygoing communication. If they’re treating you like a colleague rather than a friend, they’re likely not interested in getting closer.
12. They don’t really care about your successes or struggles.
When you share something exciting or difficult, and they brush it off or seem indifferent, it can sting. People who like you naturally celebrate your wins and empathise with your challenges—it’s part of building a connection. If they seem completely unmoved, they’re showing emotional detachment.
13. They avoid spending time one-on-one.
Group settings can feel safer for them, but if they always seem to dodge spending time alone with you, it’s a red flag. One-on-one interactions allow for deeper connections, which they might not be interested in pursuing. If they consistently opt for group plans instead, it could be a subtle way of keeping things at arm’s length.
14. They don’t laugh at your jokes.
Humour is one of the quickest ways to bond, so if someone isn’t cracking a smile or laughing at your jokes—even the decent ones—it’s worth noting. Laughter builds connection and shows comfort, both of which are hard to fake. If they seem immune to your sense of humour, it’s probably not a great sign.
15. They don’t follow up on conversations.
If you’ve mentioned something important, and they never bring it up again, it can feel dismissive. Following up—whether it’s about a project you’re working on or something you’re excited about—shows thoughtfulness. When someone doesn’t bother, it’s often because they’re just not that interested.
16. They make excuses to avoid plans.
Cancelled plans happen, but if it’s becoming a pattern with someone, it might mean they’re not keen on spending time with you. Repeated excuses or vague responses about “rescheduling” often point to a lack of effort. Someone who genuinely likes you will prioritise time with you, even when they’re busy.
