15 Things People Do When They’re Not Really Listening To You

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There’s nothing worse than telling a story or relaying what you feel like is important info, only to realise you’re basically talking to a brick wall.

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Here are 15 telltale signs someone’s ears are closed for business. These habits might seem subtle, but they’re dead giveaways that your words are going in one ear and out the other.

1. They’re glued to their phone.

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You’re pouring your heart out, and they’re scrolling through their phone like it holds the secrets of the universe. Sure, they might nod occasionally or throw in an “uh-huh,” but their eyes are locked on that screen. It’s pretty clear your words are playing second fiddle to whatever’s happening in their digital world.

2. They keep changing the subject.

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You’re trying to discuss your day, but somehow the conversation keeps veering off into left field. Before you know it, you’re talking about their neighbour’s new car or last night’s game. It’s like they’re playing conversational pinball, bouncing from topic to topic, never letting your words stick.

3. They interrupt… a lot.

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You can barely get a full sentence out before they’re jumping in with their two cents. They’re so eager to speak, they can’t even wait for you to finish your thought. This rapid-fire interrupting is an obvious sign they’re more interested in their own voice than yours.

4. Their eyes are wandering everywhere but you.

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While you’re talking, their eyes are doing a grand tour of the room. The ceiling, the window, that interesting speck on the floor — anything seems more captivating than your face. They can’t seem to make eye contact to save their lives.

5. They give generic responses.

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“Yeah,” “Okay,” “That’s nice” — these vague replies keep coming, no matter what you’re saying. You could announce you’re moving to Mars, and they’d probably just say “Cool.” These autopilot responses are a clear sign your words are going in one ear and out the other.

6. They’re multitasking.

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You’re sharing something important, and they’re busy folding laundry, checking emails, or making a sandwich. Sure, they might claim they can do two things at once, but let’s be real — your story is definitely getting the short end of the attention stick.

7. They don’t ask follow-up questions.

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When someone’s truly listening, they usually want to know more. But if your conversation partner never asks for details or clarification, it’s a sign they’re not really absorbing what you’re saying. They’re hearing words, but they’re not processing the story.

8. Their body language is closed off.

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Arms crossed, body turned away, leaning back — these physical cues speak volumes. While their mouth might be saying “I’m listening,” their body is practically shouting “I’m not interested!” It’s clear that nothing you’re saying is sinking in.

9. They’re quick to offer advice without fully hearing the problem.

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You’ve barely outlined your situation, and they’re already firing off solutions. It’s like they’ve jumped to the last page of a book without reading the middle. This rush to problem-solve often means they’ve missed crucial details — because they weren’t really listening in the first place.

10. They’re easily distracted by their surroundings.

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A car honks outside, someone walks by, the wind blows — and suddenly, their attention is gone. You get them for a few seconds before they tune you out again. Your words are competing with every little distraction, and they’re losing.

11. They don’t remember things you’ve told them before.

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You find yourself repeating information you’ve shared in previous conversations. Your promotion, your dog’s name, your allergy to peanuts — it’s all news to them, every single time. Your words basically go into a void, never to be remembered again.

12. They’re always waiting for their turn to speak.

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You can almost see the words bubbling up inside them as you talk. They’re not listening; they’re just waiting for a gap in the conversation to insert their own story. It’s less of a dialogue and more like two people taking turns making speeches.

13. They misinterpret what you’re saying.

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You’re talking about apples, and somehow they think you’re discussing oranges. These misunderstandings happen because they’re only catching bits and pieces of what you’re saying, filling in the gaps with their own assumptions.

14. They’re excessively agreeable.

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No matter what you say, they’re nodding and agreeing. You could say the sky is green, and they’d probably say “Absolutely!” Their over-the-top agreeableness often means they’re on autopilot, not really processing your words but just trying to seem engaged.

15. They rush you to finish.

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“Get to the point,” “So what happened next?” — they’re always trying to speed up your story. It’s like they’re treating your words like a fast-forward button, eager to get to the end (or just end the conversation). Their impatience is a clear sign they’re not savouring the details — or really listening at all.