How To Tell The Difference Between Trusting Your Gut And Self-Sabotaging

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Trusting your gut is important — your intuition is there to warn you about potential danger, after all.

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However, for some people, listening to that little voice in your head is actually a form of self-sabotage rather than self-protection. But, how are you supposed to tell the difference? Here’s how you know whether you’re noticing legitimate red flags or if you’re making them up and potentially ruining a good thing.

1. Your gut feeling doesn’t come with a side of panic.

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When you’re trusting your instincts, it usually feels calm and clear. Like, “Yeah, this is the right thing to do.” Self-sabotage, on the other hand, often brings along its mate anxiety for the ride. If your “gut feeling” has you in a cold sweat or feeling like you’ve had ten espressos, it might be your inner saboteur talking. Take a deep breath and ask yourself if you’re really following your instincts or just freaking out.

2. Trusting your gut doesn’t involve a list of “what-ifs”.

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Genuine intuition tends to be pretty straightforward — it’s not playing out every possible worst-case scenario in your head over and over. If you find yourself spiralling into a vortex of “But what if this happens? And then this? And then the world explodes?” you’re probably in self-sabotage territory. Your gut doesn’t need to create a disaster movie to make its point.

3. Your intuition isn’t out to get you.

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Here’s the thing: your gut instinct generally wants what’s best for you. It’s not trying to trip you up or make your life harder. If the voice in your head is telling you that you’re not good enough, or that you don’t deserve good things, that’s not your gut — that’s your insecurity having a chinwag. Your intuition is more likely to encourage you, not tear you down.

4. Gut feelings don’t usually contradict cold, hard facts.

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While intuition can pick up on subtleties that logic might miss, it doesn’t usually fly in the face of clear evidence. If you’ve got a “feeling” that directly contradicts all available facts, it might be worth a second look. Your gut’s smart, but it’s not psychic. If your instinct is telling you the sky is green when you can clearly see it’s blue, that’s not intuition — that’s delusion, mate.

5. Trusting your gut doesn’t mean ignoring all advice.

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Following your instincts doesn’t mean you have to go it alone. If you’re truly listening to your gut, you’ll probably find that you’re open to hearing what other people think. You might not agree with them, but you’re not afraid to listen. Self-sabotage, on the other hand, often involves shutting out all other opinions. If you’re covering your ears and shouting “La la la, I can’t hear you!” every time someone offers advice, you might want to check if that’s really your gut you’re listening to.

6. Your intuition isn’t wishy-washy.

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Gut feelings tend to be pretty consistent. They don’t change with the wind or depending on who you talked to last. If your “instinct” about something is flip-flopping more than a politician before an election, it’s probably not your gut talking. That’s more likely to be uncertainty or fear masquerading as intuition. Your real gut feeling will stick around, even if you try to ignore it.

7. Trusting your gut feels empowering, not limiting.

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When you’re really following your intuition, it usually feels like you’re opening doors, not closing them. It’s liberating, not restrictive. If your “gut feeling” is constantly telling you to avoid things, play it safe, and stay in your comfort zone, that might be your fear talking. Your true intuition is more likely to encourage growth and positive change, even if it’s a bit scary.

8. Your gut doesn’t speak in absolutes.

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Intuition tends to be nuanced. It’s not all black and white, do or die. If you’re dealing with a lot of “always” or “never” statements, that’s more likely to be self-sabotage. Your gut understands that life is complicated. It might say “This doesn’t feel right,” but it’s less likely to say “If you do this, your life will be OVER.” That kind of dramatic absolutism is usually fear talking, not intuition.

9. Your gut feeling doesn’t require constant reassurance.

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When you’re truly following your intuition, you don’t need to keep asking everyone and their dog if you’re doing the right thing. You feel pretty solid about your decision, even if it’s a bit nerve-wracking. If you find yourself constantly chasing validation or playing the “but what do you think?” game with everyone you meet, that might be self-doubt masquerading as intuition. Your gut doesn’t need a focus group to back it up.

10. Intuition doesn’t usually come with a side of shame.

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Your gut instinct is generally pretty shame-free. It’s not there to make you feel bad about yourself or your choices. If your “gut feeling” is accompanied by a hefty dose of “You’re such an idiot for even considering this,” that’s probably your inner critic having a field day, not your intuition. Your gut is more of a friendly guide than a playground bully.

11. Trusting your gut doesn’t mean ignoring logic entirely.

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Here’s the thing: your intuition and your logical brain aren’t sworn enemies. They can actually work together quite nicely. If your “gut feeling” is telling you to completely disregard all rational thought and jump off a cliff (metaphorically speaking… I hope), that’s not intuition — that’s impulsiveness wearing a clever disguise. Real intuition can stand up to a bit of logical scrutiny.

12. Your intuition isn’t hung up on other people’s opinions.

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While it’s normal to consider how your actions might affect other people, your gut instinct isn’t overly preoccupied with what everyone else thinks. If you’re basing your decisions primarily on avoiding judgement or trying to earn people’s approval, that’s people-pleasing, not intuition. Your gut is more concerned with what’s right for you than what’s popular with the peanut gallery.

13. Gut feelings don’t usually lead to procrastination.

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Intuition tends to spur you into action, even if that action is a careful “wait and see.” If your “gut feeling” is constantly telling you to put things off, avoid decisions, or wait for the perfect moment, that might be fear of failure in disguise. Your intuition is more likely to say “Now’s the time” than “Maybe next year… or the year after… or never.”

14. Your intuition isn’t a broken record.

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While gut feelings can be persistent, they don’t usually get stuck on repeat. If you find the same thought circling your brain non-stop with no way to turn it off, that’s more likely to be anxiety or obsessive thinking than intuition. Your gut tends to make its point and then shut up, not nag you incessantly.

15. Trusting your gut doesn’t mean expecting the worst.

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Your intuition isn’t inherently pessimistic. While it might warn you about potential pitfalls, it’s not in the business of assuming everything will go pear-shaped. If your “gut feeling” always leads you to expect the worst possible outcome, that’s probably your anxiety throwing a party, not your intuition. Your gut is more of a realist than a doomsday prepper.