Ever felt like you’re going crazy in a relationship?
If you’ve ever dealt with a narcissist, you know this feeling all too well. Narcissists are basically professional manipulators, and their words can be their most powerful weapon. They use subtle yet damaging phrases to twist reality, shift blame, and make you doubt yourself. Here are some of the most devious things they say — if you hear any of these, don’t fall for them!
1. “Why are you so sensitive?”
This is a classic narcissistic tactic to invalidate your feelings and make you question your own reactions. They might say it with a condescending tone, implying that your emotions are irrational and exaggerated. By dismissing your feelings, they avoid taking responsibility for their own hurtful actions and make you doubt your own perception of reality.
2. “You’re overreacting.”
Similar to the previous phrase, this one aims to brush off your emotions and make you feel like you’re making a big deal out of nothing. Narcissists use this tactic to deflect blame and avoid addressing the issue at hand. They might even accuse you of being “crazy” or “hysterical” to further undermine your credibility.
3. “I never said that.”
This is a classic example of gaslighting, a manipulative tactic where narcissists deny reality and make you question your own memory. They might blatantly lie about something they said or did, or twist your words to make you doubt what you heard. This can leave you feeling confused, disoriented, and doubting your own sanity.
4. “You’re imagining things.”
Narcissists often try to undermine your perception of reality by making you believe that your thoughts and feelings are not valid. They might dismiss your concerns as “paranoia” or “delusions,” making you question your own sanity and making it easier for them to control the narrative.
5. “You’re so dramatic.”
This phrase is designed to belittle your emotions and make you feel like you’re overreacting. Narcissists use it to invalidate your feelings and dismiss your concerns. By labelling you as “dramatic,” they shift the focus from their own behaviour to your perceived flaws, making it easier for them to continue their manipulative tactics.
6. “You’re always making things up.”
This accusation is a form of gaslighting that aims to undermine your credibility and make you doubt your own version of events. Narcissists use it to deflect blame, avoid accountability, and maintain control over the narrative. By making you feel like you’re constantly fabricating stories, they can manipulate you more easily.
7. “You’re crazy/paranoid/jealous.”
This is a classic narcissistic tactic to discredit you and make you doubt your own sanity. They might accuse you of being mentally unstable or overly jealous, even if there’s no basis for these accusations. This tactic is designed to isolate you, make you feel like no one will believe you, and ultimately make it easier for them to control you.
8. “You’re just too needy/clingy.”
Narcissists often blame their victims for their own behaviour, accusing them of being too needy or demanding. This is a way of deflecting responsibility and making you feel like you’re the problem. They might even use this excuse to justify their own emotional distance or lack of intimacy in the relationship.
9. “You’re misinterpreting everything.”
This phrase is a form of gaslighting that aims to confuse you and make you doubt your own perception of reality. By making you question your interpretation of events, they can manipulate you into believing their version of the truth. This can lead to feelings of self-doubt, insecurity, and confusion.
10. “Nobody else has a problem with me.”
This is a common tactic used by narcissists to isolate you and make you feel like you’re the problem. They might point out that other people seem to get along with them just fine, implying that there’s something wrong with you for having issues. This can make you feel like you’re being unreasonable or overly sensitive, and it can really knock your confidence in your own judgment.
11. “You’re just too emotional.”
Narcissists often use this phrase to invalidate your feelings and make you question your own emotional responses. They might accuse you of being “hysterical” or “unstable” to deflect from their own wrongdoings. This tactic can be especially damaging if you’re already feeling vulnerable or insecure.
12. “You’re lucky to have me.”
This arrogant statement is designed to make you feel grateful for their presence in your life, even when they’re treating you poorly. Narcissists often believe they’re better than everyone else and feel entitled to your admiration and devotion. This sense of entitlement can be suffocating and make you feel like you’re constantly in their debt.
13. “You’re not good enough for me.”
This is a classic narcissistic put-down, designed to chip away at your self-esteem and make you feel unworthy of their love and affection. They might compare you to other people, criticise your appearance or accomplishments, or simply belittle you with subtle insults. This tactic is intended to make you more dependent on them and less likely to challenge their behaviour.
14. “I’m the only one who truly cares about you.”
This manipulative statement is designed to isolate you from your support network and make you believe that you have no one else to turn to. Narcissists often try to undermine your relationships with friends and family, making you more reliant on them for emotional support and validation. This isolation can make it harder for you to see the truth about their behaviour and leave the relationship.
15. “You’re making this all up.”
This gaslighting tactic is used to deny your reality and make you doubt your own perceptions. They might accuse you of lying, exaggerating, or misremembering events. This can leave you feeling confused, disoriented, and unsure of what to believe. It’s important to trust your instincts and remember that your feelings and experiences are valid.
16. “I’m just joking.”
Narcissists often use humour as a weapon to disguise their insults and hurtful comments. They might make sarcastic remarks, belittle your feelings, or make jokes at your expense. When you get upset, they might dismiss your concerns by saying “I’m just joking,” making you feel like you’re overreacting or taking things too seriously.
17. “You’re so sensitive.”
This phrase is often used to dismiss your feelings and make you feel like you’re being unreasonable. Narcissists might use it when you express hurt or anger, making you question your own reactions and feel like you’re the problem. This can lead to self-doubt, insecurity, and a feeling of powerlessness in the relationship.
18. “You’re always the one starting arguments.”
Narcissists are experts at deflecting blame and shifting responsibility. They might accuse you of starting arguments or causing drama, even when they are the ones instigating conflict. This tactic is designed to make you feel guilty and defensive, and it can prevent you from addressing the real issues in the relationship.
19. “You’re overthinking everything.”
This phrase is another way that narcissists invalidate your feelings and perceptions. When you express your concerns or anxieties, they might dismiss them as “overthinking” or “making a mountain out of a molehill.” This can make you doubt your own judgment and feel like you’re being unreasonable.
20. “You’ll never find anyone better than me.”
This is a classic narcissistic tactic to instil fear and insecurity in you. They might threaten to leave you, belittle your worth, or remind you of all the ways they are supposedly superior to everyone else. This manipulation is designed to make you feel dependent on them and less likely to leave the relationship, even if it’s unhealthy or abusive.
