The male midlife crisis is so cliché, it’s almost farcical at this point.
That’s not because it doesn’t happen, but mostly because it’s ridiculously common. While women struggle with getting older, as well, some men really struggle to accept that they’re not in their 20s anymore, and the things they do to try to cling to any last semblance of youth are pretty silly. Here are some of the more cringeworthy things they do to seem like they’re still down with the kids.
1. Sporting graphic tees with edgy slogans
Nothing says, “I’m still cool” like a graphic tee with a slogan you’d usually find on a college kid. While a classic tee can look great, going for edgy phrases can make them seem like they’re trying a little too hard. Keeping it simple sometimes says more.
2. Overdoing it with the cologne
Whether it’s a cloud of 90s cologne or an ultra-trendy scent, over-spraying can be a bit much. A hint is enough to make a statement without overwhelming the senses. Subtlety can work wonders, and your cologne should announce itself quietly.
3. Constantly bringing up “back in my day” stories
We get it – the glory days were great. But too many “back in my day” tales can leave the impression they’re living in the past. Sharing memories is one thing, but sometimes it’s best to let the old days stay a little nostalgic.
4. Using too much slang or “young” lingo
Trying to keep up with all the latest slang is admirable, but if every sentence sounds like a TikTok reel, it might be a bit much. It’s best to keep it natural – no need to fit in with the younger crowd by force. Classic language always sounds cool.
5. Rocking backward caps like it’s still 2003
The backward cap look has its place, but wearing it daily might come off as trying to reclaim that high school vibe. Occasionally, sure – but some styles are best saved for the right moment. Choose the hat position carefully.
6. Wearing too many accessories at once
Wristbands, necklaces, rings, and maybe a flashy belt – sometimes, less is more. Over-accessorising can be fun, but it’s easy to cross the line into trying too hard. A single, well-chosen accessory often does the trick.
7. Trying out every new fitness fad
Source: Unsplash From juice cleanses to extreme boot camps, chasing every fitness trend can seem like a quest for eternal youth. Sticking to what works is often more impressive than cycling through every craze. A balanced approach to fitness is timeless.
8. Talking about celebrity crushes like they’re 20 years younger
Constantly mentioning crushes on young celebrities can feel a little out of touch. Appreciation is one thing, but there’s a line between admiration and obsession. Celeb gossip is best kept casual, not like you’re 16 again.
9. Bragging about how late they can stay up
Staying up until dawn used to be a badge of honour, but constantly trying to prove you can pull all-nighters feels a bit forced. Rest is underrated and doesn’t need to be skipped to prove a point. The real win is a good night’s sleep.
10. Oversharing about their workouts on social media
Posting every gym session or protein shake might seem like dedication, but it can come off as trying to show off a youthful lifestyle. A little mystery goes a long way – not every workout needs to be broadcast. Sometimes, results speak for themselves.
11. Dressing like they’re shopping in the junior’s section
There’s a time and place for fashion trends, but squeezing into clothes meant for teens can sometimes send the wrong message. Dressing in styles that flatter, rather than just following trends, can be a game-changer. Age-appropriate doesn’t mean boring.
12. Always playing “the cool guy” with the younger crowd
Trying too hard to blend in with younger folks by being “the cool guy” can end up having the opposite effect. A genuine attitude is way more appealing than trying to play a role. Just being yourself works at any age.
13. Overly defensive about their age
If someone can’t take a joke or comment about ageing without getting defensive, it’s often a sign they’re clinging to their youth. Embracing a few gray hairs or life changes shows confidence. The more comfortable you are with age, the cooler you seem.
14. Buying the latest “must-have” gadget just to keep up
Tech is great, but constantly upgrading to stay current can feel like a bit of a race. Some gadgets are useful, while others are just trends. A streamlined setup often says more than having the latest flashy gadget.
15. Trying to be the life of every party
Being the centre of attention is fun, but trying to always be “the fun one” can get exhausting (for everyone). Sometimes being low-key is just as appealing as stealing the show. The most relaxed person in the room often draws the most respect.
16. Obsessing over hair (or hair loss) a little too much
Hair maintenance is fine, but going overboard with treatments, gels, and cover-ups can make it obvious someone’s feeling insecure. A good haircut and a little confidence are all it takes to look sharp. No need to hide the natural changes.
17. Refusing to “settle down” when it might be time
If someone’s still resisting commitment or stability just to keep things “fun,” it can seem like they’re clinging to a younger version of themselves. Settling down doesn’t have to mean settling – it just means embracing new phases of life. There’s something attractive about embracing where you are now.
