Life can be tough, and sometimes it’s easier to pretend everything’s fine rather than face uncomfortable situations.
The problem is, avoiding reality only leads to bigger problems down the road. If you’re noticing these signs in your life, it might be time for a wake-up call. Here’s a brutally honest look at some ways you might be avoiding reality and why it’s time to pull your head out of the sand.
1. You constantly make excuses for your behaviour.
If you always have a reason why things aren’t your fault, it’s time for a reality check. Maybe you’re late to work because of “traffic” every day, or you didn’t finish a project because “something came up”. Obviously, things do happen, but consistently blaming everyone and everything else for your flaws or bad behaviour is a sign you’re not taking responsibility for your actions.
2. You never check your bank balance.
Ignoring your financial situation won’t make money problems disappear. If you’re afraid to look at your account balance, or you’re constantly surprised by how little money you have, you’re avoiding the reality of your financial health. Facing your money issues head-on is the first step to getting them under control.
3. You ghost people instead of having tough conversations.
Source: Unsplash Cutting off communication might seem easier than addressing conflicts or ending relationships, but it’s a clear sign of avoidance. Whether it’s a friend you’ve fallen out with or a work email you’re dreading, ghosting only postpones the inevitable and often makes the situation worse. Confronting these issues directly is tough, but it’s the mature way to handle relationships.
4. You’re always “too busy” to deal with important tasks.
If your go-to response for everything from doctor’s appointments to home repairs is “I’m too busy”, you might be using busyness as an excuse to avoid dealing with things. Everyone’s busy, but constantly putting off important tasks is a form of self-sabotage. It’s time to prioritise and face these responsibilities head-on.
5. You blame other people for your unhappiness.
It’s easy to point fingers at your boss, your partner, or society for your dissatisfaction, but if you’re constantly blaming everyone else without looking at your own choices and actions, you’re avoiding the reality that you have the power to change your situation. Taking responsibility for your happiness is a must for personal growth.
6. You’re always starting new projects but never finishing them.
Jumping from one unfinished project to another might feel productive, but it’s often a way to avoid the hard work of seeing things through. If your life is littered with half-finished tasks, it might be time to confront why you’re afraid of completion. Are you scared of failure, or perhaps success? Facing these fears can help you break the cycle.
7. You avoid looking at the scales or your reflection.
Source: Unsplash If you’re deliberately avoiding mirrors or refusing to weigh yourself, you might be in denial about your health or appearance. While obsessing over these things isn’t healthy either, completely ignoring them won’t solve any underlying issues. Facing reality about your physical health is the first step towards making some much-needed changes.
8. You’re constantly scrolling through social media.
Endless scrolling through social media can be a way to avoid dealing with your own life. If you spend hours mindlessly browsing Instagram or TikTok instead of engaging with the world around you, it might be time to confront what you’re trying to avoid in your own reality.
9. You refuse to talk about certain topics.
If there are subjects you absolutely refuse to discuss, whether it’s politics, your relationship status, or your career, it might be a sign you’re avoiding confronting something important. While it’s okay to have boundaries, completely shutting down certain conversations can be a form of denial.
10. You’re living beyond your means.
Source: Unsplash If you’re constantly buying things you can’t afford or living a lifestyle that doesn’t match your income, you’re avoiding the reality of your financial situation. This might feel good in the short term, but it’s setting you up for serious problems down the line. Facing your true financial picture is crucial for long-term stability.
11. You avoid making decisions.
If you feel paralysed when it comes to making choices, big or small, you’re likely avoiding the responsibility that comes with decision-making. Whether it’s choosing a restaurant or deciding on a career move, constant indecision is a way of avoiding potential consequences and staying in a safe, but stagnant, place.
12. You’re always “fine” even when you’re not.
Constantly insisting that everything’s “fine” when it clearly isn’t is a classic sign of avoidance. While it’s not necessary to share your feelings with everyone, consistently denying your emotions, even to yourself, prevents you from addressing and dealing with them properly.
13. You self-medicate with alcohol or other substances.
Using alcohol or other substances to numb yourself or escape reality is a dangerous form of avoidance. If these are your go-to coping mechanisms, it’s a sign that there are underlying issues you’re not facing. Confronting these problems sober is a must.
14. You’re always planning for the future but never living in the present.
While it’s good to have goals, if you’re constantly focused on some future version of your life without taking action in the present, you’re avoiding your current reality. Life happens now, not in some idealised future. It’s time to start living in the present and working actively towards your goals.
15. You avoid conflict, even when it’s necessary.
If you agree with everyone just to keep the peace, even when you really disagree, you’re avoiding the reality of conflict. While constant arguing isn’t healthy, some level of conflict is normal and necessary in relationships. Learning to handle disagreements maturely is important for personal growth and healthy relationships.
16. You’re stuck in a cycle of procrastination.
Constantly putting things off until the last minute, or not doing them at all, is a clear sign of avoidance. Procrastination might feel like you’re avoiding stress in the short term, but it usually leads to more stress and poorer outcomes in the long run. Facing tasks head-on, even when they’re unpleasant, is a crucial life skill.
17. You refuse to ask for help when you need it.
If you’re struggling but refuse to reach out for support, you might be avoiding the reality that you can’t do everything alone. Whether it’s pride, fear of vulnerability, or a misguided sense of self-reliance, not asking for help when you need it can lead to burnout and missed opportunities for growth and connection.
