Friends are vital for our overall wellness — they make us laugh, pick us up when we fall, and generally keep us sane.
Sadly, making and keeping them isn’t easy, especially these days, and there are an alarming number of people out there with no friends at all. For men, this can be particularly isolating and damaging for their mental and emotional health. Here are some of the things men with no social circle tend to do, as well as some ways you can help them out.
1. They avoid sharing personal details about their life.
Source: Unsplash Men without real friends often keep their thoughts and feelings to themselves, even in casual conversations. They may avoid vulnerability, fearing judgment or rejection. Encouraging openness, even in small ways, can help them begin building trust and deeper connections with other people.
2. They over-rely on their romantic partner for emotional support.
In the absence of close friendships, they may expect their partner to fulfil every emotional need, which can strain the relationship. Developing outside connections allows them to distribute emotional weight and strengthens all their relationships in the long run.
3. They rarely receive calls or messages “just to check in.”
If their phone only rings for work or obligatory family matters, it’s a sign they may not have people reaching out to them. Encouraging them to take the initiative to check in with people they care about (and who care about them) can be a good first step toward building mutual connections.
4. They struggle to name a best friend.
When asked who they turn to outside of family, they may hesitate or struggle to answer. This reflects the lack of a strong, go-to person in their life. Suggesting group activities or hobbies can help them find like-minded people and establish closer friendships.
5. They fill their time with solitary activities.
Men without friends might lean heavily on solo hobbies, like gaming, binge-watching, or exercising alone, to pass the time. While these activities can be fulfilling, encouraging them to explore group versions—like joining a gym class or gaming league—can open doors to new friendships.
6. They make self-deprecating jokes about having no friends.
Humour can be a mask for deeper feelings of loneliness. Self-deprecating jokes about being a “lone wolf” or having no one to hang out with often reflect an underlying sadness. Responding with empathy rather than laughter can show you take their feelings seriously and want to support them.
7. They don’t celebrate milestones with anyone outside family.
Birthdays, promotions, or personal achievements often pass without celebration or acknowledgement from friends. Suggesting they invite other people to share these moments—even in small ways—can help them see the value in reconnecting with people.
8. They avoid social events entirely.
Fear of feeling out of place or awkward at gatherings might cause them to withdraw from social events altogether. Encouraging them to attend low-pressure meetups or go with someone they trust can help ease social anxiety and rebuild confidence in social settings.
9. They rely heavily on online communities.
Online friendships can provide a sense of connection, but relying on them exclusively may indicate difficulty forming real-world bonds. Suggesting ways to bring online connections into real life—like attending a meet-up or event—can help bridge the gap between digital and physical friendships.
10. They avoid asking for help.
Without close friends, they might hesitate to ask for assistance, even when they need it. This can lead to feelings of isolation and overwhelm. Encouraging them to lean on acquaintances or even talk to a therapist can help them feel less alone.
11. They overcompensate with material possessions.
Men without friends sometimes try to fill the void by focusing on material achievements, like expensive cars or gadgets. While there’s nothing wrong with enjoying these things, suggesting activities that emphasise shared experiences over possessions can help shift the focus toward connection.
12. They often say, “I don’t need anyone.”
This defensive attitude can be a way to cope with feelings of loneliness. While independence is valuable, everyone benefits from meaningful connections. Helping them see the joy and support friendships bring might encourage them to open up to the idea of building relationships.
13. They don’t talk about their feelings.
Men without close friends often have no outlet for their emotions, leading them to suppress their feelings entirely. Suggesting therapy or encouraging them to journal can help them process emotions in a healthy way, even if they’re not yet ready to share them with anyone else just yet.
14. They don’t seem to laugh as often.
Without friends to share jokes, stories, and playful moments, their life may feel more serious or muted. Inviting them to join fun activities or introducing them to group events can reignite a sense of joy and camaraderie.
15. They show envy toward other people’s friendships.
Seeing people with close-knit groups may bring out subtle envy, even if they don’t admit it outright. This can be a sign that they long for those bonds themselves. Encouraging them to reach out to old friends or make new connections can help them take steps toward building their own circle.
16. They struggle to maintain casual friendships.
Without the skills to nurture relationships, even casual friendships might fizzle out quickly. Offering a bit of advice, like sending a quick text or arranging a catch-up over coffee, can remind them that relationships thrive with small, consistent efforts.
