There’s nothing worse than having someone in your life you just can’t rely on.
Whether because they constantly cancel on you last-minute or they’re simply never there when you need them, unreliable people tend to tell on themselves pretty quickly. To save yourself a whole load of time, energy, and potential heartache, here are some signs someone with inevitably let you down time and time again. If you notice them, you’d be better off investing your focus on other, more reciprocal relationships.
1. They’re vague about plans.
If someone never commits to a specific time or place, they’re likely leaving room to bail. Vague plans like “Let’s hang out sometime” without any follow-up can be a sign they’re not serious. Their lack of commitment might leave you hanging more often than not. Clear plans are often a good indicator of reliability.
2. They frequently cancel last minute.
If someone’s always coming up with last-minute reasons they can’t make it, it might not be a one-off. Constantly backing out of plans can be a sign they don’t value your time. While things come up for everyone, repeated cancellations say a lot. Consistency in showing up is important.
3. They’re slow to respond (or don’t respond at all).
If it takes ages to get a response from them, or they leave messages unanswered, they may not prioritise staying in touch. Flaky people often have a habit of going radio silent for no apparent reason. Their lack of communication can leave you feeling ignored. Prompt replies show they’re invested in keeping up.
4. They overpromise but underdeliver.
Flaky people might get excited and make big promises, but rarely follow through. Whether it’s plans or favours, they often say what sounds good without actually doing it. It’s easy for them to make commitments in the moment, but their actions rarely match. Reliability is shown through actions, not just words.
5. They “forget” plans you made.
If someone claims they completely forgot about plans you’ve both discussed, it might be more than a one-time slip-up. Forgetting once is understandable, but if it’s a pattern, it’s a sign they’re not prioritising your time. Remembering commitments shows respect for the other person. Frequent forgetfulness hints at a lack of seriousness.
6. They’re constantly “so busy.”
When someone always blames their busyness for not following through, it can be a polite way of saying they just don’t want to make time. Everyone’s busy, but reliable people still manage to show up. A “too busy” excuse only goes so far. People make time for what matters to them.
7. They’re all talk, no action.
Flaky people often have big plans or talk about future adventures, but when it’s time to act, they’re nowhere to be found. They enjoy the idea of things, but don’t actually follow through. Saying and doing are two very different things. If they’re all talk, it’s best not to rely on them.
8. They’re late more often than not.
Being late happens, but if someone is consistently showing up after the agreed time, they might not be the most dependable. Chronic lateness can be a sign they don’t value other people’s time. Showing up on time shows respect and reliability. Tardiness can hint at a larger pattern of flakiness.
9. They bail on group plans.
If they’re regularly the one who drops out of group events last minute, they might not care much about letting people down. Flaking on groups without a second thought is often a sign they’re not reliable. Showing up for people is a big part of trustworthiness. Regularly bailing shows they’re not invested.
10. They dodge follow-up details.
Source: Unsplash When it comes time to confirm specifics, flaky people tend to go quiet or change the subject. They don’t want to get pinned down by details because that would mean committing. Details matter, and avoiding them often says they’re not all in. Reliable people are fine with following through on plans.
11. They’re hot and cold in communication.
Source: Unsplash Some days they’re super responsive, and other days, it’s like they forgot you exist. This back-and-forth style of communication can be a sign they’re not invested. Consistency is key in building trust. If they’re in and out, it’s hard to rely on them.
12. They often have “emergencies” pop up.
Source: Unsplash If every cancelled plan seems to come with a sudden emergency, it might be their go-to excuse. Everyone has unexpected things come up, but constant “emergencies” can be a red flag. True emergencies are rare, and frequent excuses can be a pattern. Genuine reliability means sticking to plans when possible.
13. They rarely initiate plans.
Source: Unsplash Flaky people often rely on everyone else to make the plans and do the organising. If they never initiate, they may not be that interested in hanging out. People who want to be involved will make an effort. Not taking the initiative can show they’re only halfway in.
14. They ghost after making a plan.
Source: Unsplash After agreeing to meet up, if they suddenly go silent, it could be a sign they’re not serious about following through. Going MIA after setting plans is a classic flaky move. Following up is easy, and going quiet raises suspicions. Communication is key to trust.
15. They act like plans are optional.
Source: Unsplash If they treat plans like casual suggestions rather than commitments, it’s likely they don’t feel strongly about following through. This casual attitude might mean they’ll show up – or not. Dependable people treat plans as commitments, not options. Respect for plans is respect for your time.
