Not everyone is an open book — lots of people prefer to keep things to themselves in life.
There’s no right way to be, of course. As long as someone’s not being deliberately secretive or dishonest, keeping your cards close to your chest isn’t really that big of a deal. However, it can be harder to deal with for those who are more open and expressive. Here are some of the things people who are a bit more closed off tend to do (much to some people’s confusion and annoyance).
1. They’re masters of deflection.
When the conversation gets too personal, these people are pros at changing the subject. They might ask you a question about yourself or bring up a completely unrelated topic. Before you know it, you’ve forgotten what you were asking them in the first place. It’s not that they’re being rude — they just prefer to keep certain things to themselves.
2. They’re selective with their social media posts.
Don’t expect a play-by-play of their day on Facebook or Instagram. These people are careful about what they share online. They might post occasionally, but it’s usually pretty general stuff. You won’t see them airing their dirty laundry or sharing every detail of their personal lives for the world to see. They value their privacy in the digital world just as much as in the real one.
3. They’re good listeners.
People who keep their cards close to their chest often excel at listening. They’re happy to let other people do the talking, which takes the focus off them. Plus, by listening more than they talk, they gather information without giving much away. It’s not that they’re trying to be sneaky — they just prefer to understand before being understood.
4. They answer questions with questions.
Ask them something personal, and they might respond with a question of their own. It’s a subtle way of redirecting the conversation and avoiding revealing too much about themselves. This habit can sometimes make conversations feel a bit like a tennis match, with questions bouncing back and forth.
5. They’re vague about their plans.
When asked about their weekend plans or what they’re up to later, they tend to keep it general. “Oh, just running some errands” or “I’ve got a few things lined up” are typical responses. They’re not necessarily hiding anything exciting — they just prefer to keep their movements to themselves.
6. They have a great poker face.
You won’t catch these people wearing their hearts on their sleeves. They’ve mastered the art of keeping a neutral expression, even when they’re feeling strong emotions. This doesn’t mean they’re cold or unfeeling — they just prefer to process their emotions privately rather than letting them show on their face.
7. They’re private about their relationships.
Whether it’s friendships, family, or romantic relationships, they don’t share much about their personal connections. They’re unlikely to gush about their partner or complain about family drama. Their relationships are their business, and they prefer to keep it that way.
8. They don’t overshare.
You won’t hear these people telling their life story to a stranger on the bus. They’re careful about what personal information they share and who they share it with. This isn’t about being secretive — it’s about valuing their privacy and being selective about who they let into their inner world.
9. They’re often seen as mysterious.
Source: Unsplash Because they don’t reveal much about themselves, they might come across as enigmatic or hard to read. This isn’t intentional — they’re not trying to be mysterious. They just prefer to keep certain aspects of their lives private, which can make people curious about them.
10. They’re careful with their words.
People who keep their cards close to their chest tend to think before they speak. They’re not likely to blurt out the first thing that comes to mind. Instead, they consider their words carefully, ensuring they’re not revealing more than they intend to.
11. They keep their emotions in check.
Source: Unsplash They’re usually pretty good at managing their emotions in public. You’re unlikely to see them having a meltdown or jumping for joy in the middle of the office. This doesn’t mean they don’t feel things deeply — they just prefer to express their emotions in private or with a select few people they trust.
12. They’re independent problem-solvers.
When they’re facing a challenge, these people are more likely to try to solve it on their own before asking for help. They might see asking for assistance as revealing a vulnerability, so they prefer to tackle problems independently when possible.
13. They’re observant.
Source: Unsplash While they might not share much about themselves, they’re often keen observers of the people around them. They pick up on small details and remember things people say. This habit helps them understand the people around them without having to reveal much in return.
14. They’re cautious with trust.
People who keep their cards close to their chest don’t trust easily. They take their time getting to know someone before they start opening up. This isn’t about being unfriendly — it’s about being careful with who they let into their inner circle.
15. They value their alone time.
They often need time alone to recharge and process their thoughts and feelings. They might turn down social invitations or take solo trips. This isn’t about being antisocial — it’s about valuing their personal space and time for self-reflection.
