15 Behaviours That Make People Think You’re Unstable

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Chances are, you want people to see you as intelligent, composed, and most of all, mentally stable.

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However, there may be habits you have that send the opposite message. Instead of giving off a confident and collected vibe, you seem scattered, eccentric, and maybe a little bit in need of professional help. If you don’t want people to question about ability to keep it all together, here are some behaviours to drop ASAP. Of course, if you’re truly struggling, it’s worth reaching out to your GP or even Samaritans at 116 123.

1. Sudden mood swings

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If you’re happy one moment and then furious or upset the next, it can make people feel uneasy around you. It creates a sense of unpredictability, which can leave people unsure of how to act or what to expect from you. Consistent mood swings without explanation might make people start to question your emotional stability.

2. Overreacting to small things

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Everyone gets upset from time to time, but if you’re losing it over things like a wrong coffee order or a minor inconvenience, it stands out. Over-the-top reactions can make people feel uncomfortable and unsure about how you’ll handle bigger challenges. Keeping things in perspective shows you have control over your emotions.

3. Dramatic statements over minor issues

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Declaring that your life is over because of a small setback might seem like venting to you, but it can alarm people. Even if you don’t mean it, constantly using extreme language can make people take your words seriously and worry about your mental state. It also makes it harder for them to know when you’re genuinely struggling.

4. Making impulsive decisions

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Spontaneity can be fun, but making major life decisions without thinking them through—like quitting your job on a whim or getting married quickly—raises eyebrows. People might start to question whether you think things through or act rashly, which can affect how they view your reliability and judgment.

5. Inconsistent behaviour

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If your words and actions don’t align, or you keep changing your mind on important matters, it can confuse the people around you. Whether it’s being hot and cold in relationships or constantly flip-flopping on decisions, people may start to feel like they can’t trust what you say or where they stand with you.

6. Excessive neediness

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Everyone needs a little validation from time to time, but if you’re always seeking reassurance or demanding attention, it can wear people down. It might make them feel like you’re overly dependent on them for emotional support, which can make them question your ability to handle things on your own.

7. Not being able to handle criticism

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If even a little bit of feedback sends you into a tailspin, it can make people think you’re emotionally fragile. Reacting defensively or lashing out when someone offers constructive criticism might make them hesitant to be honest with you in the future. Being able to take criticism with grace shows emotional maturity.

8. Always getting into arguments

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If drama seems to follow you wherever you go, people will eventually start to wonder why. Constant arguments, falling outs with friends, or picking fights regularly might lead people to believe you thrive on conflict. Over time, this can make you seem difficult to get along with and make people keep their distance.

9. Extreme jealousy

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A little jealousy is normal, but if you’re constantly suspicious or possessive in your relationships, it can make you seem insecure. Accusing your partner of things without reason or getting upset when they interact with people can push people away and make them question your emotional stability.

10. Substance abuse

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If you regularly drink too much or turn to drugs, people around you might start worrying about your ability to cope. Especially if your personality or behaviour shifts when you’re under the influence, it can be a red flag that makes people wonder if you’re using substances to mask deeper issues.

11. Threatening to hurt yourself

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Bringing up self-harm in a manipulative way is not only alarming, but also emotionally taxing for those around you. It puts people in a difficult position, making them feel responsible for your well-being. This kind of behaviour can push people away because they feel overwhelmed by the responsibility.

12. Struggling to maintain relationships

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If friendships and relationships in your life tend to end quickly or badly, people might start to question why. Having a pattern of short-lived connections makes people wonder if you’re the common denominator in the problem. It can also make them hesitant to get close to you for fear of the same outcome.

13. Extreme risk-taking

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Living on the edge might seem exciting, but regularly putting yourself in dangerous situations can come across as reckless. Whether it’s physical risks or pushing boundaries in other ways, people might start questioning your judgment and whether you have the ability to protect yourself or other people.

14. Paranoid thinking

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If you’re always worried that people are out to get you or that there’s a hidden agenda behind everything, it can come across as paranoid. While it’s important to be cautious, seeing threats where there are none makes people wonder if you’ve lost touch with reality and can affect their willingness to be around you.

15. Lack of emotional regulation

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Everyone has bad days, but if you’re constantly losing control of your emotions in public or inappropriate settings, it raises concerns. Bursting into tears during meetings or having public meltdowns can make people uncomfortable and question your ability to handle life’s normal stresses. Managing your emotions in a healthy way is key to building trust with people.