If you second-guess every decision you make or often wonder if you’ve got things wrong, you clearly lack self-trust.
It’s so important to be able to rely on your own perceptions and instincts to make good choices in your life. However, you could be doing things that damage your relationship with yourself and cause major distrust within you. If you have any of these habits, it’s time to break free and start relying on your gut a bit more!
1. You need other people’s approval before you can make a decision.
It’s one thing to ask for advice, but if you’re always running your choices by friends, family, or colleagues before committing, you’re undermining your own judgement and reinforcing the idea that you can’t trust yourself to make good decisions. Start small by making some choices without asking anyone else and see how it feels.
2. You obsess over past mistakes.
We all mess up sometimes, but dwelling on the past can seriously dent your self-trust. If you’re constantly replaying that awkward conversation or cringing at a decision you made years ago, you’re teaching yourself that you can’t be trusted. Try to learn from mistakes and then let them go. Your past doesn’t define your future abilities.
3. You compare yourself to influencers, celebrities, or even friends on social media.
Scrolling through carefully curated highlights of other people’s lives can make you feel inadequate. You might start to doubt your own choices and wonder why your life doesn’t measure up. Remember, social media is rarely the full picture. Focus on your own journey and what makes you happy, not what looks good on Instagram.
4. You act like your achievements are no big deal.
When someone compliments your work, do you brush it off or attribute your success to luck? This habit of minimising your accomplishments reinforces the belief that you’re not capable or worthy. Start acknowledging your hard work and skills. Accept compliments graciously and give yourself credit where it’s due.
5. You overcommit to please everyone else.
Saying yes to everything might make you popular, but it’s a guaranteed way to burn out and lose trust in yourself. When you agree to things you don’t want to do or don’t have time for, you’re ignoring your own needs and judgement. Practise saying no and putting yourself first.
6. You avoid taking risks or trying new things.
Sticking to your comfort zone might feel safe, but it can stifle your growth and self-confidence. When you shy away from new experiences or challenges, you’re telling yourself that you can’t handle the unknown. Take small steps outside your comfort zone regularly. Each success will boost your self-trust.
7. You rely too heavily on other people’s opinions.
It’s natural to value the input of people you respect, but if you’re constantly swayed by the last person you spoke to, you’re not trusting your own instincts. Try forming your own opinion before asking other people what they think. You might be surprised at how often your initial judgement is spot on.
8. You talk to yourself badly.
That little voice in your head can be your worst enemy. If you’re constantly putting yourself down or telling yourself you’re not good enough, you’re destroying your self-trust. Challenge these negative thoughts. Would you speak to a friend that way? Treat yourself with the same kindness and respect you’d offer other people.
9. You procrastinate on important things.
Putting off important work or decisions might seem harmless, but it’s a form of self-sabotage. When you procrastinate, you’re essentially telling yourself that you can’t be trusted to handle things in a timely manner. Break big tasks into smaller, manageable chunks and tackle them head-on. Each completed task will build your self-trust.
10. You ignore your intuition.
Got a gut feeling about something? Don’t brush it off. Your intuition is built on years of experience and subconscious processing. When you consistently ignore these instincts, you’re teaching yourself that your inner wisdom can’t be trusted. Start paying attention to your gut feelings and see how often they lead you in the right direction.
11. You set unrealistic expectations for yourself.
Source: Unsplash Aiming high is great, but if you’re constantly setting the bar at impossible heights, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. This pattern of falling short of your own expectations can make you doubt your abilities. Set challenging but achievable goals. Celebrate your progress along the way, not just the end result.
12. You avoid making decisions.
Source: Unsplash Dithering over choices, big or small, is a clear sign you don’t trust yourself. Whether it’s what to have for dinner or which job offer to accept, indecision can be paralysing. Start by making quick decisions on small things. As you build confidence in your choices, you’ll find it easier to tackle bigger decisions.
13. You constantly seek reassurance from anyone who will offer it to you.
Source: Unsplash If you’re always asking people “Are you sure?” or “Did I do the right thing?”,you’re undermining your own judgement. This habit can become a self-fulfilling prophecy, making you feel less confident in your decisions. Try to sit with the discomfort of uncertainty instead of immediately looking for reassurance. Trust that you’ve made the best decision with the information you had.
14. You neglect self-care.
Source: Unsplash Skipping meals, not getting enough sleep, or pushing yourself too hard at work are all ways of telling yourself that your needs don’t matter. This neglect can lead to burnout and a deep distrust in your ability to take care of yourself. Prioritise your physical and mental well-being. When you take care of yourself, you’re sending a powerful message that you trust yourself to know what you need.
