Being “nice” isn’t just about politeness — you’ll need to go a bit further than that.
Obviously, a lot of people are jerks and make it hard to be kind, but that’s all the more reason to do it. You don’t want to stoop to their level, do you? If you’re having a tough time being a nice person, doing these things could make it a slightly less frustrating process.
1. Listen to people without jumping in.
When someone’s talking to you, really give them your attention. Make eye contact, nod, and hold off on jumping in with your thoughts before they finish. It’s about showing that you respect what they have to say and are genuinely interested in their perspective. You’ll be surprised at how much closer you feel to people when you stop waiting for your turn to talk.
2. Throw out compliments that are meaningful (and heartfelt).
Start noticing the good things people do or say, and don’t hold back in telling them. Be specific, whether it’s about their work, their attitude, or how they handled a tough situation. A genuine compliment can really make someone’s day. But remember, people can tell when you’re just going through the motions – keep it real.
3. Appreciate the little things people do.
Don’t let small gestures go unnoticed. Whether someone holds the door open or refills the office coffee pot, acknowledge it with a thank you. When people feel seen and appreciated, it encourages even more positive behaviour. Plus, it makes the environment a lot more pleasant for everyone involved.
4. Watch how you say things.
Sometimes it’s not what you say, but how you say it. Pay attention to your tone, body language, and even your facial expressions. Being mindful of this helps keep conversations friendly, even when discussing tougher topics. If you’re calm and approachable, people will respond to you in a much better way.
5. Offer to help before they ask.
If you see someone struggling, step in and offer to help out. It could be something small, like carrying groceries or helping with a project. Being proactive about helping makes a huge difference. But make sure you’re not overstepping – sometimes people need to do things on their own.
6. Try to see things from their side.
When you’re in a tough situation or disagreement, take a moment to imagine what the other person might be feeling. You don’t have to agree with them, but trying to understand where they’re coming from can lead to a more compassionate approach. It often turns conflict into collaboration instead of confrontation.
7. Cut people some slack when they slip up.
Nobody’s perfect, and everyone has bad days. When someone makes a mistake, resist the urge to get frustrated or critical. Offer support or a gentle nudge in the right direction, but avoid making them feel worse. Showing patience helps create a positive environment where people aren’t afraid to learn from their mistakes.
8. Keep what people share with you private.
If someone confides in you, respect that by not gossiping or sharing their personal business. Being the kind of person everyone can trust goes a long way in building meaningful relationships. When you show that you’re a reliable friend who doesn’t engage in drama, people will feel safe opening up to you.
9. Say you’re sorry when you mess up (and mean it).
Owning up to your mistakes isn’t a sign of weakness – it shows maturity and respect for the people around you. A sincere apology without excuses shows that you care about their feelings and are willing to make things right. It’s a small gesture that can make a huge difference in maintaining good relationships.
10. Really care about other people’s lives.
Ask people about what’s going on with them – their hobbies, family, or what they’re working on. Showing a real interest in other people makes them feel valued and appreciated. Plus, remembering little details about their lives and bringing them up later shows you’re not just making small talk.
11. Make sure everyone feels included.
Source: Unsplash In social settings, take note if someone’s hanging back or feeling left out. Help draw them into the conversation or activity. It’s as simple as asking for their thoughts or introducing them to the group. Being the one who includes everyone makes you someone people want to be around.
12. Do nice things without expecting anything back.
Source: Unsplash Small acts of kindness can brighten someone’s day. Pay for a stranger’s coffee, help a neighbour with their bags, or leave a kind note for a co-worker. It’s not about getting recognition, but about spreading good vibes that make the world a little better for everyone.
13. Respond to negativity with positivity.
Source: Unsplash When someone’s venting or focusing on the negative, try to be the one who steers the conversation toward solutions or silver linings. Being upbeat in the face of challenges doesn’t mean ignoring real problems, but it does show that you’re focusing on how to improve things rather than dwelling on what’s wrong.
14. Respect people’s time.
Source: Unsplash Being on time for meetings, respecting deadlines, and not wasting people’s time shows that you value them. It’s a simple way to show respect in both personal and professional settings. And if you’re running late, just let them know – good communication goes a long way in showing you care.
